Kids at the playground

I just got back from taking the boys to the playground. There was a little girl on the play thing carrying around and sucking on a seeded pretzel stick. The kind with all sorts of different seeds on it. Touching everything. I'm uncomfortable telling another mom "my son is allergic to seeds". But I also think it's good to alert people. I'm not trying to scare anyone or tell them what they can do in a public place, but how would you handle it? I just tried to watch Wil closely, so that he didn't go too close to this girl. But she was swinging on bars that Wil touched, etc. I'm not at all trying to point the finger at someone, because again, it's a public park, but I'm just wondering what other PKFA (parent's of kids w/food allergies) do in these situations. What do you say? Or do you just take your kid and leave? Anyone's suggestions/comments are welcome.

unfortunately, I would probably take my kids and leave. How unfair to the allergic child and sibs, but really I am so unconfrontational, I don't think I could say anything to another parent about it. , and like you said, it is a public play ground. yuck.

sorry that happened. i would likely just take my kid and leave.
i have a question, do any of the disinfectant wipes work to remove all traces of allergens? maybe just carry a case of wipes and be diligent about wiping stuff before he touches it. i do it a lot anyway cuz kids are gross lol.

That is a good idea, but I am not sure if they would really do the trick, as in completely wiping away all traces. I don't think Wil has to worry too much about touching things he is allergic to, or being close to it, but I'm not sure and I don't want to find out. The kids at his school eat peanut butter sandwiches all the time and they are sitting just a few seats from him and luckily no reactions have come up, yet. It is scary. But I am not confrontational like Tara said. They have every right to be there. It's just hard to see it and feel like I want to put an iron shield around my kid.

you should talk to the allergist about it. i am sure there is something out there to keep him safe. i know it's hard hon. hang in there. it does get easier as he gets older.

They allow peanuts in the same room, at the same table? I think I'd be a bit upset about that. In Ashley's school, her classroom was "a peanut/nut free zone". It was posted and reminders were sent home to the parents on a monthly basis. All the kids with peanut allergies in Kindergarten were put in this classroom and no one was permitted to bring snacks that had nuts. I would definitely talk to the school about implementing something like this. At the very least, they should have a peanut/nut free area of the room.

As for the kids at the playground, I would probably just leave as well. I know it's not fair to your kids. However, if you think about it, what would have happened if the girl had done the same thing but left seconds before you had gotten there? Maybe carrying wipes is not a bad idea anyways.

We always make sure if we are going to be some where in a large public area that Jakob has on his allergy t shirt, and I know people read that, it doesnt really change their behavior but it does alert them to his allergies. sometimes it starts a conversation with a mom...

I think I would leave, and I am rather confrontational..
I dont think the wipes can remove all the proteins from a food, and there is no way on a play ground to get everything the offending food touched.

we had a situation where after playing for a while in a wooded park, a child handed Jakob an acorn while I was looking for caleb, I only turned my back a minute, but when I turned around he was holding it..I panicked and wiped him and took him home...

you just never know..
we never got 5 feet with out our epi pen

As long as Wil doesn't digest any of the seeds, there is almost no chance of him becoming anaphylactic by simple contact. In open air a few small seeds really couldn't atomize enough molecules to make inhalation a problem either. At the very worst, he could possibly have a slight skin reaction to contact, but food allergies normally don't exhibit in this way. I would say it's safe to play at a playground where things that Wil are allergic to are present as long as Wil knows he can't share foods with the other kids. The best way to protect Wil is to educate him. Whenever Wil is in public, it should be automatic that he washes his hands thoroughly before he touches his fingers to his mouth. The public in general will not care about or share in your concerns. I fear continuing to pursue "public education" will mostly bring you frustration.

Look at it this way - I'm allergic to bee stings. Try as I might I just can't see the world banning bees just because they make my throat close up. I've learned to take care around them. It's also helped me as I have also learned how to not make them aggressive toward me.

Why? Is Jakob allergic to acorns?

Why? Is Jakob allergic to acorns?

I have to tell you that you are incorrect in saying that "normally there isnt that big of a reaction when its just skin contact." Jakob has had several very severe reactions to very minimal contact on the skin ..for example the skin prick test uses very minimal amounts of a food, and he did get sob, and diaphoretic, from 15 secs of an egg contact. the site turned into a large welt after 30 seconds, and he was o2 and in the er for observation directly after that.
Jakob also has environmental allergies, there was also an incident where we were never sure of the offending substance, but it caused large blisters to form on his eye lids and we were sure at that time it was something environmental because that was back when he didnt eat any solids at all.

Jakob isnt allergic to acorns, he is allergic to tree nuts, and our allergist said that this is one possible substance to avoid.

I have a lot of interesting articles from philadelphia childrens hosp on allergies and rast and skin testing if you are interested..

Ed, I understand that being allergic to bee stings and nuts are equal as far as severity, both can lead to death. But I have to point out that they are far from being the same when it comes to how prevalent nuts are these days. They are everywhere, bees are not. I know you can't control when a bee decides to sit on you and sting. But bees aren't at the mall food court, they aren't baked in cupcakes handed out at a birthday party, they aren't in a pinata or in Halloween candy...Let's hope not! It's like everything a child enjoys, nuts are there. So although I completely agree with your statement that I can not see the world banning nuts just because they make my son's throat close up, I can be sure that those that are around my child be cautious. I can teach caregivers to know what foods are safe and what foods are not. I know it comes with educating your child first, but Wil is only 3.5 and although he is aware, he certainly needs a lot of supervision. He would grab a peanut butter cookie in a heartbeat, but I know he would never purposely touch a bee. Just a little different.

Dee Dee, when interviewing preschools, there wasn't an option for a "nut free" classroom. They all assured me that they would monitor the children, making sure they washed their hands, and that Wil could sit at a different table. The daughter of the Director of the school I chose, is also severely allergic to peanuts. So I knew the awareness was already there. Of course I asked her to ban nuts completely, but she told me that if she has allowed parents to bring in PB sandwiches since she opened, she could not suddenly change that. She did allow me to write all parents a letter though, to at least "alert" them of how serious Wil's allergies are, what the teachers are to do in an emergency, and how the kids would wash their hands. I'm not sure if it's helping since the letter just went out next week, but it's a start. I pickup Wil at 12:30 on school days and I'm always a little early so that I can watch lunchtime. The teacher is always sitting with him so that she can monitor any food sharing/handling. She is very careful. They all sit at a little table, but Wil is always on the other end of any child eating PB sandwich. It is scary, but I have to believe that by allowing Wil to SEE his allergens, he will be cautious himself. I don't want the allergen foods to be taboo, resulting in temptation, kwim? But it is hard to know they are there.

I don't understand this. At our children's school, which they have been going to for 3 years now, has ONE child who's allergic to peanuts. The WHOLE SCHOOL is banned from bringing ANY type of nut products.

At the beginning of EVERY year, a letter is sent home to each parent educating them on the severity of the peanut allergy and that no peanut products be sent in a child's lunch. Whichever teacher has an allergic child in their class, they send a special letter home stating that so-and-so has an allergy to whatever product and what needs to be done in case of emergency.

DS has had the same boy in his class each year who has a severe allergy to peanuts. There's a piece of paper tacked to the chalkboard with a large head and shoulder's picture of the boy, his full name, his address, his parents' names, his parents work numbers, his doctor's name, the name of his allergy, that he has an Epi Pen, how exactly to administer it, and I'm not sure what all else. Attached to the bottom of the paper is a business envelope with his Epi Pen in it.

In their 2nd year of going to that school, a child joined in November. She has an allergy to other types of nuts. A letter went home immediately stating that NO NUTS OF ANY KIND were allowed at the school. So I don't see why your school can't do that.

Personally if it were me, I would walk over to the other parent and nicely tell them about my childs allergy and what would happen if he were to come in contact with it. Most parents would understand. My kids dont have allergy's like that but if another parent were to come to me, I would have taken it away from my child and told them they could have it back later.

On a side note: I wouldnt let my kid run around eating a playground anyways theres to many germs.

I don't understand this. At our children's school, which they have been going to for 3 years now, has ONE child who's allergic to peanuts. The WHOLE SCHOOL is banned from bringing ANY type of nut products.

At the beginning of EVERY year, a letter is sent home to each parent educating them on the severity of the peanut allergy and that no peanut products be sent in a child's lunch. Whichever teacher has an allergic child in their class, they send a special letter home stating that so-and-so has an allergy to whatever product and what needs to be done in case of emergency.

DS has had the same boy in his class each year who has a severe allergy to peanuts. There's a piece of paper tacked to the chalkboard with a large head and shoulder's picture of the boy, his full name, his address, his parents' names, his parents work numbers, his doctor's name, the name of his allergy, that he has an Epi Pen, how exactly to administer it, and I'm not sure what all else. Attached to the bottom of the paper is a business envelope with his Epi Pen in it.

In their 2nd year of going to that school, a child joined in November. She has an allergy to other types of nuts. A letter went home immediately stating that NO NUTS OF ANY KIND were allowed at the school. So I don't see why your school can't do that.

Believe me, I wish our school did the same as yours. The kids with food allergies at your school are fortunate, but it doesn't mean it will happen everywhere. All states are different. By law, a school can not discriminate against a child with food allergies, meaning they can't say "sorry, we won't take you. We won't administer the Epipen". But I believe there is no law stating a school HAS to ban nuts if a child has an allergy in the school. I wish it were that easy. Again, I've written the letters, I've taught the teachers how to administer the Epipen, I've given them a list of foods will can/can not eat. I have written a plan of action in case of an emergency. I'm doing the best I can. If there are laws that I am unaware of, please educate me.

First off I dont know why any child needs a snack at a play ground bc its very dangrous to be running around with food in the mouth but thats me
I would just take my child home or just go to another area where its safer for them to play.

I take it everyones child has an epi pen right?

They tried to do that at our school and it didnt fly
The state only requires a peanut free table AND the TABLE is labled and it gets cleaned with its own clean cloth and put a side from the other tables
We have 4 kids in our school and so far so good

Like I said many of times as the kids get older the better it will get I know with my Erin she is very allergic to Coconut she get hives the size of lemons and her feet blow up along with her hands and face at the age of 4 she could find the word Coconut oil and Coconut in all products by herself bc I worked with her I couldnt depend on others to take care of my child for me.

And Katie with her Lactose problems she had to learn fast I'm just glad she was older when that started and that is so much harder to control then the coconut.

Rae, are you familiar with the country singer trace atkins? i keep hearing he is involved in a lot of raising awareness on food allergies in kids, and he did a lot of fund raising for FAAN. I wonder if he has a site that might have some ideas on laws and letters that can be written to schools?
maybe even his own fan website?

I just havent had a chance to check yet.
i also havent had to deal with schools yet, we havent gone really to any type of group activities other then church and they have been more then accomidating.

you know it just makes me think that if one of these allergy kids had say, diabetes instead, the rules are a lot different for them as far as where the meds are kept and how they are treated, or some of the other issues kids have to face, i just wish people would learn to take food allergies just as serious.
a lot of it is education, most people think just itching and rashes are food allergies or some mild swelling, i dont think half the parents realize how serious it can be..
i hope someday its something they show to parents during kindergarden night, and talk about the issues affecting kids health. it certainly would help to start there and start young.

I don't know who that is, but I'll look him up, thanks!

Sorry if I'm getting off topic......Lisa, do you mind me asking why it didn't fly at your school? I would love to hear the feedback, if you have it. What were the concerns from the opposing side, pros/cons?

I don't know who that is, but I'll look him up, thanks!

Sorry if I'm getting off topic......Lisa, do you mind me asking why it didn't fly at your school? I would love to hear the feedback, if you have it. What were the concerns from the opposing side, pros/cons?

Something about the school cant stop kids from bring in foods bc its not a state requirment the school just has to provide a safe food area for the children with food allergies to eat. And which they did plus all these kids grew up together so they all know each other very well and are all friends for the most part.
Now I guess all the parents were happy with the safe food area so they never put any more pressure on the school about anything else bc all and all our school is pretty safe but I can say many schools are not.

If you want to contact this mom let me know and I will try and get her e-mail

I'm so sorry your kiddos have these allergies. I couldn't imagine being allergic to nuts. I think I eat a PB&J every other day. I understand why some schools can't/won't go nut-free school wide. I personally would be very upset if my son couldn't have a PB&J for lunch. Since you guys have brought this up I will make a point of being consciencious of other kids allergies by teaching my son to be careful with his nuts.
I wish you the best with this...

can I just ask why you be upset about not being able to send peanut butter and jelly to school for lunch. I have heard other mommies mention this, just this way. and I wonder what it is that would cause you to be upset by this?

my thoughts on it are, thats its only one meal and its only a few hours a day where children who can eat the nuts have to go without. And they are asked to go without so that a child with the nut allergy doesnt accidently touch it, or touch something another kid left peanut butter on, and cause the child to have his throat close up and possibly faint, and have a huge ruckus caused and stop breathing and be sent to the hosp. and hope that they make it in time and that the epi pen is close enough to them to stop the reaction before the die.
I mean these kids can die.

I totally dont think it should be the kids responsibility who brings in the sandwich to be careful that they dont touch or infect the allergy kid. I mean they are kids, they are going to get it everywhere. Its not their fault. I bet if you asked more of the kids who can eat the nuts, to not eat them, and explained what could happen to their friends who cant eat them, they would have no issues not eating it while near them.

I dont mean to come off confrontational, I have always just wanted to ask someone this exact question and havent been able to because we were normally at church when it came up and it wasnt the right time.

I would not upset by not being able to send any food to school. Granted our school didn't ban nuts. I also see no reason for a school wide ban but for more education.
Johnny's food problems were intolerances and not truly allergies so for that we are lucky. But I even at 2 I know plenty of allergic kids that don't eat food unless their parent has ok'd it because they know what happens when they eat one of their allergens. And in Kindergarten the one boy with FA (including peanuts) would not dream of trading food with anyone. His mom asked that if someone was bringing snacks in for their kids b-day to please email her ahead of time so she could send in something safe for her son. Making a batch of cupcakes and freezing them for just that occasion. Yes it sucks to be left out of the specific special goodies that are around but spending your life expecting everyone to accommodate you is jus. t going to cause a lot of frustration.
I understand the desire to protect our kids from anything that could hurt them and nut allergic children have a whole other world of concerns. But educating them about the dangers as well as his school is your best option. Expecting huge change is not. Give your child more credit. they are smart and can understand a lot more than they are getting credit for.

I TOTALLY agree that education is the key.
but in my own instance, Jakob is almost 3 and he is not able to control himself when it comes to seeing other kids eating choc snacks, and things that contain nuts. he knows it something yummy and wants what they have.
I know as he gets older he will have a better understanding of the consequences but for now its to much of an expectation to place on Jakob to remember that he cant eat things with milk, or eggs, or nuts or corn.
i think its a really good idea to keep substitutes on hand and take them in for all the kids if thats possible, and if not having something for the one who cant have that birthday cake is the next best option.
I have also been able to teach our older son, caleb, to watch out for Jakob and the food he cant eat, and caleb is always more then willing to turn down a candy bar and tells the person, i cant eat that my brother is allergic. and he does it with a sense of pride.
I wish they would find some cure for these poor allergy kids. I think its hard enough sometimes with what kids go thru then to have to deal with these issues also.

Thank you. This is really all I ask for of other parents, to be aware of the issue and to not ignore it. Some choose to look the other way, so just having a parent say "Rae, I had no idea Wil had nut allergies. I will be more careful next time" is huge, I'm grateful. It's a step in the right direction because I know that as any parent, we want to keep our kids safe and we wouldn't want our child to put another child in harms way. But it's hard. Again, hard on both sides. Because again, I understand what an EASY and economical food PB is. And with nuts being so high in fiber and protein, it's hard to ask people to buy an alternative.

Stacy, as much as I would party like a rock star the day Wil's school bans nuts, I don't think the worry would be over. Wil is also highly allergic to seeds, so if a school chose to serve Sun Butter as an alternative in the lunchroom (sunflower butter), I would still be fearful. You just never know even with a ban, kwim? Even at schools with a ban on nuts, they can't guarantee that a parent forgot one day. Can staff really check every item? Probably not. And you know as well as anyone, nuts have a sneaky way of being in a lot of foods we don't suspect them to be in! I do agree that in cases like the daycare at the YMCA, where kids are only in there for 90 minutes max, banning all snacks is not too much to ask for. And I really think at the preschool level, it should be required because of age. But not in elementary. But like I said, even with a ban on nuts, I would never feel that Wil is 100% safe. I need to learn to accept that.

I agree with a lot of what Lisa said (both Lisa's as a matter of fact), about educating your child with FA, because it's true, no one but your direct family will ever care that much. It's not to say I'm giving up the fight to educate other parents and caregivers about the seriousness of allergies, but by allowing Wil to experience situations where he is around his allergens, will only be the way he learns to protect himself. Yeah, he wouldn't be able to pickout a nut hidden in a chocolate brownie, but the more I alert him about sharing snacks and encouraging him to always ask an adult before eating something, the better off he will be. I know how difficult it is to let go. Believe me, every time I drop Wil off at school, it's like a punch in the stomach. Like someone is whispering in my ear "you are going to trust them? you're insane! you're an awful mom, what if something happens?" But I have to have faith that if I give Wil the opportunities he deserves NOW, he will gain the confidence to take care of himself in the future. The Director of Wil's school and I were talking about this exact issue this morning. I asked her what her daughter does at school at lunchtime. She is 9. All her friends know of her allergy to nuts, but if a friend has something in their lunch with nuts, the daughter says "I can't eat with you". That must be hard to say when you're only 9, but hey, I sure wish I learned confidence like that at such an early age1 What a strong person she is, at only 9! She is standing up for herself, in a diplomatic way. Kids are respecting her. I hope Wil does the same.

No, I was correct in that statement. Jakob's aggressive auto-immune response to skin contact is abnormal even for allergic children, but I'm sure the docs have already stated this.

Please don't get me wrong, I applaud all of the efforts of parents to raise food allergy awareness, but you do it at the risk of being branded. Be comfortable with that brand, and continue to push awareness wherever and whenever possible, but expect others, however ignorant the response, to lash back that your kids' problems aren't theirs. I know how hard it is to tell a 3 year-old he can't have this or that, and make her understand how something perfectly harmless to a peer could make her very sick or even kill her. We had a food allergic child, as Lisa has already stated. We checked the incoming foods for coconut and got the strange looks like we were off kilter with the world.

All I was trying to express is that regardless of the intensity of your crusade you're still going to have to be diligent on your own. As your child gets older this definitely becomes easier as he will learn how important it is to stay away from things that will make him sick. You have a 15 year uphill battle ahead, and again, let me reiterate, I applaud you!