? for those who don't (didn't) EBF?

Just wondering, if you bottle feed your baby, did your Dh help with night feeding? I am so torn as to what is best to do. I don't know if I can be up 3 times a night with Emma (30-45 minutes each time) then be up between 6-7am with Jason and be functional all day. I understand that DH has to work all day.

BTW- Dh is not asking me to take on all Emma's nighttime feedings, but I want to do what is fair and easiest for both of us....I know its only temporary....eventaully she'll be sleeing through the night

Jason does go to preschool 3 days a week, so I have that time to rest if I need to, but its not every day. I am worried that I'll be too tired to keep Jason entertained

anyway, what worked for you family?

Hi Edie, I had a really hard time producing milk so BF'ing was next to impossible. We bottle fed from day one with supplementing and trying to nurse, DH did not once get up in the middle of the night. Unfortunately, I did it all. Luckily for us we have 1 year mat leave but it was really hard when we were first home, Matthew was 3 and half when Thomas was born so I was really tired a lot but I toughed it through. I could really kick DH for not getting involved because even to this day they do not go to him for comfort or even when they wake up now in the middle of the night from a fright or something they still call me. I really haven't offered any advice just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

well i bottle fed and i did it on my own as i was alone:(

But if he is willing hun i would let him. I know the feeling of exhaustion..i would get up every few hours to feed her and then i had to be up at 530 to get ready for work as i had to go back to work when she was 4 months old:( I would of given anything for someone to be there to help me even if it was a couple times a night.

Me and my DH took turns. One night he would do it and then the next night I would do it. Raygen was sleeping thru the night by the time she was 3 months old so we didnt have to do it for long. With Lexi I was a single Mom so I done it all.

edited for spelling

This post has been edited by lisar on Dec 8 2006, 06:45 AM

With the Boys I did them all their dad was really no help. With Em DH did most of them just b/c he wanted to pretty much. With Leah I have done them all, but I am not working so I can rest when the girls are sleeping. I know for my sister and BIL they were kinda splitting it up some. BIL would do the frist feeding then my sister do the next. I hope you find something that will work for you guys.

HI, I would say go ahead and get her used to the bottle and some one else helping her get to sleep, and helping her eat, thats something I regret not doing. I think that it helps. and will help the bond with daddy and his little girl too.

I didn't give dh a choice in the matter. Since he was working later in the day and could rest once the kids were off to daycare, he did it at night.

We both have more or less full days... but while he sits at a computer all day, I run around after little kids and keep them occupied...AS WELL AS cleaning and cooking etc... so I figure for us, he's got no choice in the matter.

I know how you feel, Edie. It was hard for me to insist that Scotty take on some of the feedings when he had to get up early and work 12-14 hours the next day. However, when I got really sleep deprived I asked him to help out with at least one feeding (Ethan was BF until he was 6 mos old, but still waking in the night until he was well over a year old.) Don't be afraid to ask him if you are feeling tired...I'm sure he'd be more than willing to help out on occasion.

My husband helped with night feedings. I didn't even have to ask, he just did it. We're both her parents, there's no reason both of us shouldn't be involved. Even before I started pumping and then eventually giving her formula, he'd get up and bring her to me or change her if she needed it

Thats a catch 22 because yes he does have to work but so do you with jason and emma - so you could try alternating nights and then alternating who gets up with Jason on weekends and you can feed emma her bottle in bed and if she falls asleep you can too maybe....I don't think it is a bad thing for a man to feel the exhaustion of having a newborn.....and I am trying to sound mean.

Tom NEVER got up in the night trust me -

With Lorelei we did breast and bottle/formula. And Dh and I took turns at night. Before 4am I got up with her, and after 4 am DH would get up with her. If it was a weekend, we'd alternate. I'd get up on Saturdays all night, and he'd get up on Sunday's all night. That way we were both tired all the time.

The nights before DH had to work (12 hr shift) I'd get up both times but if he was off the next day we'd each take one feeding. That way we both got a 6 hr. stretch of sleep.

This is so true. It's very important for you to get your rest. Your job requires you to be rested...it's not easy being a full time mommy and if you are sleep deprived it can't be good for anyone.

I made Troy help, but he also wanted to. If he didn't want to though, I would have made him anyways! We switched off at night and took turns. He usually took the earlier nightime feedings because he was still up and I am an early bedtime person, then I took the later feedings. It worked out nice.

hi there, our babies are around the same age, so I thought maybe you could try this, i discovered it to work well for me right now. I dont have anyone here helping me with the baby, so I do it all, days, nights, and getting up with 2 other kids for school. Braden goes to 1st grade, so I get up at 7 am with him, then after he leaves, I try to go back to sleep til 10:30 when Bryce needs to be up and getting ready for his preschool.
Braelynn was waking up a few times a night, and feeding. After a few days at home, with her sleeping in the bassinette right next to me, I was so exhausted, she woke up, crying to be fed. I reached over and stuck the pacifier in her mouth. Low and behold, she sucked it, and fell back to sleep. I did this a couple more times that night, and she never really cried. She just took the pacifier and went back to sleep. If at anytime she had cried and refused the pacifier I would have fed her, but since she didnt, it has worked out well for me, It buys me more sleep time. Maybe this is something you could try. Hope this helps! I too am bottle feeding, but I am bottle feeding breast milk, and I always have to pump right after she eats, to keep up with my supply.
Good luck with it all,
amber.