Spanking?

What Cary said. It's usually because I had to follow through. You know it really doesn't work either. I get more results when I say I'm going to take something away or she won't be allowed to play her Dora game before bed. I was rarely spanked as a child because when an adult got cross with me it would hurt my feelings. Jade is a lot like this. I usually send her to her room and wait until she has stopped crying and then I will explain to her why she got into trouble. She has gotten better since we have gotten here and there is more stability in her life. I hope to continue that for her.

This post has been edited by MomToJade&Jordan on Jun 22 2006, 08:49 PM

I think I have each of my kids a total of once, each. It was only when they were really out of hand, and nothing else seemed to work. My oldest knew that if it got like that again, it could happen again, she really didnt seem to misbehave again. It just plainol didnt work with my son, he didnt care, sending him to his room was more of a punishment. For my youngest, you get the same results if you sit down and talk with her, that works the best with her.

That shows you that each kid is different, what works for one, might not work for another.

I'm always at odds with this one. I do not want to send mixed messages when I tell them to not hit and then go and give a spanking but at the same time, in some serious scenarios, they have all gotten a pat on the butt or the hand at one time or another. It's not something I necessarily believe in or do in anger at all but I do admit, a "love tap" has been necessary at certain points.

Not yet, but my 9 year old is leaning on my last nerve.

Ed you always say it so perfectly!

When my kids were ALOT younger they got swats on the butt. Ashley twice, Tyler once. I haven't ever struck them to the point where they "feel it".

I was only spanked one time when I was a child (my parents told me what I did... believe me, I had it coming)

I never felt the need to spank my children. I wanted them to learn right from wrong by, first, it being explained to them so they understand and then followed by a loss of something. We have always used the "taking away priviledges" form of discipline.

Ashley and Tyler were never really difficult children either, so maybe that is a reason also.


ETA: although I have chosen to not spank.... I don't judge those that do

This post has been edited by Bee_Kay on Jun 27 2006, 08:18 PM

We spank but only if nothing else works or if I threaten one first (the threat use to work everytime) but its really more of a "love tap" I hate doing it but time outs don't really work for her and groundings well sometimes taking away the tv works but what am I really going to ground a 2 year old from

My son is age 8 and I don't spank him. I talk to my son and we have very good communication between us. I choose not to spank because as a child my parents over did it and crossed the line by actually beating me. When I became a parent I swore I'd never do it. I started taking early childhood education classes when he was an infant. This helped me with my own philosophy. I believe that a child doesn't learn anything from a spanking. Its an act that doesn't have any connection to what the issue was about. Instead of giving a spanking the child should have communication with the adult at the child's level so they may understand what has happened. More than anything the best time for a child to learn this is by prevention. Its hard to write about all the different ways I teach my son because its nature to me and I use a great deal of different kinds of stratagies. It works different at different times but what helps me most is teachable moments and the use of prevention.

Anyway I choose not to spank. Does me that make me a better person or worse person, no. It just is a path I chose for us.