What do I do With My Boy?

My name is Susan Rose, I am 40 years old, and a mother to two beautiful children. I have one boy, and one girl. The girl seems to be doing fine (Not suprised), but they boy is getting way too out of control. I am a successful Account Executive living in beverly hills. My husband is also successful corporate executive, and we both provide the best for our children. We have always had strict rules, and disciplinary actions were always taken against infractions. About 6 months ago, my mother and father passed away. They were quite wealthy, and alot of their estate reached my children. This is when things started getting out of hand. My mother and father had an estate worth tens of millions of dollars. In the past few years, my relationship with them soured, and we barely spoke. I have say, I deeply and truely regret it. Anyway, me and my husband inherited a little under half of the fortune. My son and daughter each recieved an equal amount. We spoke to them very seriously about what this money would mean, and how they could use it. Macaela, my daughter understood, and decided to invest her money. She has spent it on a few luxuries she didn't have before, but for the most part she had it invested. Alex however, my son, seems to not get the message clearly. He is 15 years old, turning 16 soon, and has gone on a total rampage with his money. He argued that since he is turning 16 soon, he needs a car. If you ask me, I drive both of them to school, so there is no reason he should have a car. But he bugged me and my husband so much that we finally gave in. And we didn't give in easy. He threw tantrums, and bugged us to the point where I couldn't stand it. So we talked to him about what kind of car he wanted, and for his age a Toyota is suitable. He got angry, and said he dosen't like Toyota. So after a long battle he finally bought the Mercedes-Benz he wanted. The car costed $165,000 dollars. I feel so helpless about doing anything about it, because it is his money. $165,000 dollars is insane for a car, especially for a 15 year old boy. I relaxed thinking the car would feed his desires. But I couldn't be more wrong. He is totally out of our control now, and I have no idea what to do. He wants to buy a seaside home in Malibu, he wants to create his own porn site, he wants to build his own building, he wants his own company, he wants a custom made office, and his "christmas list" goes on and on. What can I do with him? Any advice is appreciated. Thanks.

how about not giving into him? Wow you guys sound like you've got some issues after inheriting all this money.

I have a fair amount of money myeslf, and I do not believe that if I inherited money that any of it would go to the kids individually. My son is 17 and makes his own money to buy his kid's diapers and formula and maybe a little something on the side.

Because of their age, dont you have control over the money? Most times the parents have control over the money until they reach 18. Letting them (even though the daughter is more responsible) have that kind of money isnt responsible and they need to learn the value of money.

I dont know what else to say other than setting boundries with it and giving them an allowance so they will learn how to deal with budgets etc. Maybe learn to appreciate it.

Pamela

I was thinking the same thing as the previous poster. Since they are minors, don't you have control of the money until they are 18 (or 21)?

I would be more firm and not give into all his demands. He needs to learn self-control and the value of a dollar. It sounds like he's trying to grow up too soon, and has a lot of dreams that probably won't come true. We all have big dreams that we know won't happen, but that's why they are dreams!

I would hold the money back, and not give him any until he is more mature. He will regret spending all that money on frivilous stuff someday (I hope).