Highschools., It might be too late...but advice.

I need everyones input .. Thanks.

My children go to the private schools in our area, becuase the public are just terrible. My oldest daughter went to an all girls school, an amazing school non the less. She has no intrest in going, me and my husband forced her to go becuase we both believed it was the best place for her. She hated her first 3 weeks of school, but as soon as basketball started she began LOVING the school. Then my son went to a coed high school, there is a brother school that is liek the school my daughte went too, but me and my husband didnt feel the need to have the fight with him, and make him go there. Now my youngest, we pushed her to go to the same school as her sister. She faught the whole last summer. Going on and on about how she isnt a lesbian, and how she doesnt want to be compared to her sister her whole life, she didnt want to be in her shadow. She was like "If kev got to go to St Joes how come I cant!" It was horrible, she is at the same shcool her sister wnet to now. She did get called her sisters name a few times this year, and came home pretty upset about it, but she seemed to adjust a little better towards the end of the year.

Well basically the other night she suggested she swtiched schools, that she isnt happy, being the little sister anymore. I am not sure what to do, I know this school is good for her, she is getting good grades, active in sports, and hangs out wiht a lot of friends. I am just neverous that pushing her was wrong.

Do you think parents should push their children toward the better school?
Should siblinigs have to go to the same school?

A toughie, I haven't had to deal with yet but worry about anyway because I have twins (automatic comparisons even though they are boy/girl) and because their younger sister is already compared so much to the bigger sister in looks, smarts, sense of humor, you name it.

Can you have a real heart to heart with your daughter? I read a tip in a mag that said to have your teen make their list of reasons, you and DH make your list of reasons why not. Then both sides get to read through, uninterrupted, then try to eliminate the points that are not as important and try to negotiate from there. Sounds complicated and don't know if it would work, but at the very least may make her feel like you're hearing her and taking her seriously.

Siblings do not have to go to the same school. Me, my sister and brother all went to different schools.
I wouldn't neccesarily say push her towards the better school. You shouldn't force her to go the school if she doesn't want to. Just explain to her why you think that school is better. You don't want to force her and make her miserable if she really doesn't like it. You want her to feel comfortable around her surroundings and peers. I can understand why someone wouldn't like an all girls school and also why someone would want to. Just let her in a little on the decision. Remember don't force her...the more you force the more they pull away.

Tough call, I am the oldest. I never had to deal with being compared to anyone. However, my younger sister can probably relate. In fact I know she can. My parents actually went so far as to request she have different teachers than the ones I had in all possible circumstances.
I think that if the coed school and the girls school are academically equal, you should let her go. Girls can rebel regardless of their surroundings (surrounded by girls or boys). If you didn't want to fight your son about it, then why fight your daughter?

This is pretty much how I feel.

As for being compared - it never stops, so mean as it may sound, she better get used to it. I am 23 and my sisters are 24 and 20 and we still get compared to one another. I am always the "smart one" even though they are both very intelligent also, my older sis is the "pretty one" even though my younger sis is beautiful too and my younger sis is the "creative one".