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> does anyone have a nanny cam?
cameragirl21
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:28 AM
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Ok, I'm not really sure what I think of this one. In principle, I do think the parents have a right to see their caregiver in action but on the other hand, once the kids are asleep, as long as the caregiver doesn't invite over friends and/or boyfriends, and as long as she doesn't destroy or steal anything in the house, she is more or less at her leisure at that point and in all fairness, you may see more than you care to.
I remember when I was babysitting, I babysat for two girls who really thought of me as family, I was really close with them and in fact the younger one called me mom before she called her own mom that. But I was a teenager and after I put them to bed, I'd typically get on the phone with a friend or bf and I doubt very much their mom would have enjoyed listening in on the types of conversations we had.
I heard this story where this woman was a nanny and she was caring for the kids one night and she had a very itchy crotch that she kept scratching all night. Unbeknownst to her, the parents had a nanny cam and the next day the mom handed her some crotch cream and said she may have an infection that would only get worse if she doesn't quit scratching it.
I don't know but on some level I do feel that the nanny's privacy was violated, even though I believe the parents do have the right to ensure the kids are properly cared for.
I guess for me personally, I think that if you have an infant that cannot speak for him/herself then a nanny cam is a good idea but once your kids can speak for themselves, you're better off gauging a caregiver based on what your kids think of her and say about her when she's not around. Kids will tell you if they don't like someone or if someone is mean to them.
The problem is that if I were the babysitter with the itchy crotch, I doubt I'd go back after the incident with the mom and they would have lost a really good caregiver for no good reason really....
any thoughts on this...?

This post has been edited by cameragirl21 on Sep 14 2006, 07:31 AM


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mckayleesmom
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:31 AM
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QUOTE (cameragirl21 @ Sep 14 2006, 10:28 AM)
Ok, I'm not really sure what I think of this one. In principle, I do think the parents have a right to see their caregiver in action but on the other hand, once the kids are asleep, as long as the caregiver doesn't invite over friends and/or boyfriends, and as long as she doesn't destroy or steal anything in the house, she is more or less at her leisure at that point and in all fairness, you may see more than you care too.
I remember when I was babysitting, I babysat for two girls who really thought of me as family, I was really close with them and in fact the younger one called me mom before she called her own mom that. But I was a teenager and after I put them to bed, I'd typically get on the phone with a friend or bf and I doubt very much their mom would have enjoyed listening in on the types of conversations we had.
I heard this story where this woman was a nanny and she was caring for the kids one night and she had a very itchy crotch that she kept scratching all night. Unbeknownst to her, the parents had a nanny cam and the next day the mom handed her some crotch cream and said she may have an infection that would only get worse if she doesn't quit scratching it.
I don't know but on some level I do feel that the nanny's privacy was violated, even though I believe the parents do have the right to ensure the kids are properly cared for.
I guess for me personally, I think that if you have an infant that cannot speak for him/herself then a nanny cam is a good idea but once your kids can speak for themselves, you're better off gauging a caregiver based on what your kids think of her and say about her when she's not around. Kids will tell you if they don't like someone or if someone is mean to them.
The problem is that if I were the babysitter with the itchy crotch, I doubt I'd go back after the incident with the mom and they would have lost a really good caregiver for no good reason really....
any thoughts on this...?

I read about that in cosmo this month.....How embarrassing.


Personally...I don't have one, but I think they are great....I would personally make my babysitter well aware of the fact that we have one. It pains me to see the news where a person suspects something...so the put the nanny cam in and find the babysitter beating their kids.....By that time..the damage to your child physically and mentally is already done. I would rather you know that Im going to be watching. Some people say that then the nanny or babysitter will be fake....I would rather them act fake towards my child then harm them...sorry.


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cameragirl21
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:36 AM
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Cosmo, that's where I heard it! I couldn't quite remember if someone told me that story or if I'd read it somewhere....
You bring up a good point--if you have a nanny cam, you should tell the nanny, that way she knows she's being watched and can act accordingly. And even if she's fake with the kids, what does it matter, as long as she's not harming them and they're well cared for.
If she's that fake and would harm them if only you weren't watching, then she probably won't last long as your caregiver anyway and you'll get someone else who's better....


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mckayleesmom
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:38 AM
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QUOTE (cameragirl21 @ Sep 14 2006, 10:36 AM)
Cosmo, that's where I heard it! I couldn't quite remember if someone told me that story or if I'd read it somewhere....
You bring up a good point--if you have a nanny cam, you should tell the nanny, that way she knows she's being watched and can act accordingly. And even if she's fake with the kids, what does it matter, as long as she's not harming them and they're well cared for.
If she's that fake and would harm them if only you weren't watching, then she probably won't last long as your caregiver anyway and you'll get someone else who's better....

Also..by watching the tapes...you can get an idea of who is being fake and who is genuin....just like if you were interacting with them ....Then you can replace them if they seemed to phoney balogna.


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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:49 AM
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We have a nanny cam - and you can log in from any computer and see everything going on in our home. I don't care if the nanny feels like her privacy is violated. She is in my home, and will be watched. And I do find it creepy on the rare times that my husband calls and says - you guys look cute snuggled up like that.

I don't care if my children are asleep or not, she is there to do a job. And I do not pay her to watch tv, do homework, or sit on her phone with her friends. And have actually withheld pay and fired sitters for doing just that. Especailly if it's done while my children are awake. But once the children are down for the night - there are always things to do like pick up and clean up after the kids. Clean the dinner dishes used. Put toys away. Etc. There should be no reason for sitting on your butt or on the phone with friends.

And at any job - you will get fired if you waste too much of your time. And I think it is only fair that the people who are paying you - know how you are spending your time.
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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:50 AM
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My sitters do know this upfront and I have found - that it doesnt make a difference...They are going to do what they want to do.
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cameragirl21
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 08:00 AM
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Well, Tish, it's a question of whether or not you're paying her for the housecleaning in addition to the childcare.
When the kids are awake, I fully agree that they should be the center of any babysitter's attention but once they're asleep, it's a question of what was agreed upon beforehand.
For example, I am not so great at keeping my own place clean so I told people up front that I watch kids but do not wash dishes, put away toys, or do any cleaning. The kids absolutely adored me and it was mutual so for the parents, that was what made it worth it for them, they were paying for peace of mind, knowing that their kids were happy and well taken care of.
I worked hard to entertain the kids, take them out to the playground or wherever so by the time they were asleep I felt I was entitled to relax a little bit. Remember that I was there for the kids if they woke up or if God forbid there was a fire or something to that effect.
It's all a matter of what you agreed to.
As for the nanny cam making no difference with regard to the sitter's behavior, I guess the point was that at least they know they are being watched....


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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 08:10 AM
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Well I don't expect housekeeping services from any of our sitters, but I do expect to at least come home and find my house the way I left it.

And honestly, if you were my sitter you wouldn't have left my home until it was the way I left it - or else you would have went home unpaid that day and never would have been allowed back. I am one of those people - I work too hard for what I have for someone to allow my children or themselves to wreck it.

My kids don't destroy my house, but I do expect that when the sitter is there and caring for my children - that she respect my rules of cleanliness at the very least. And what they use, they know when they are done, it goes back to where it was kept.

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cameragirl21
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 08:18 AM
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Again, Tish, it's all a matter of what was agreed upon. I'm not saying you're wrong, I'm just saying that I was coming from a different perspective.
I can tell you that when I was just finishing high school, my parents moved from Ohio to North Florida. When I came home from my first year of college, I didn't know anyone in this new city because I stayed to have my last summer before college with my friends in Ohio.
My parents' neighbors had two little boys and asked me to babysit days during the summer. When their mom told me to clean something up before I went home MY mom marched across the street and said, "my daughter is not your maid and you will not treat her like one ever again, do you understand?"
And she understood.
Not paying me was not an option for any of the moms, I was a much tougher cookie than most of them.
It all comes from my mom though, she would never have allowed anyone not to pay me and she raised me to see it that way too....
Again, not saying you're wrong, we're just coming from two different perspectives.
For most people, having a babysitter like me who kept the kids happy was more important than having their dishes done when they got home.


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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 08:23 AM
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Paying for services rendered is one thing, but if takes me longer to clean up the mess you leave behind heck no you aren't getting a dime. And if you agree to watch the children then you agree to CARE for them and part of that caring is to ensure they have a safe and healthy enviornment to be in. Dirty dishes left in the sink, messes all over the place, and the like - that is niether safe nor healthy.

I never expect any of my sitters or the nanny to be a maid in our home and would never treat them as such - but cleaning up the messes that the children make while under HER supervision...That goes without saying.
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Jamison'smama
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 09:20 AM
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Yikes. If dishes in my sink make for an unhealthy environment then I'm in trouble. laugh.gif I agree, as long as someone is taking care of my kids in a loving way I'm happy. I would love if the toys are picked up but beyond that isn't necessary.

As far as a nanny cam, I think I would do it if I was working full time--I would let the nanny know that I would check on them throughout the day but was not at all interested in her phone conversations or anything else personal. I think it would be important to let them know that the only things that would be viewed would be interactions with the children and then only if you were checking in during the day or had concerns.

This post has been edited by Jamison'smama on Sep 14 2006, 09:23 AM


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luvbug00
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 09:26 AM
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By law here I believe you are required to tell you provider if you have a camera in the house. several of dog owners own them i know they are there but somtimes I forget. Which in all honesty couldn't matter less because a good sitter is the same regarless of wiether they remember the cam is there or not.


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mummy2girls
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 09:28 AM
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QUOTE (mom2my2cuties @ Sep 14 2006, 11:49 AM)
We have a nanny cam - and you can log in from any computer and see everything going on in our home. I don't care if the nanny feels like her privacy is violated. She is in my home, and will be watched. And I do find it creepy on the rare times that my husband calls and says - you guys look cute snuggled up like that.

I don't care if my children are asleep or not, she is there to do a job. And I do not pay her to watch tv, do homework, or sit on her phone with her friends. And have actually withheld pay and fired sitters for doing just that. Especailly if it's done while my children are awake. But once the children are down for the night - there are always things to do like pick up and clean up after the kids. Clean the dinner dishes used. Put toys away. Etc. There should be no reason for sitting on your butt or on the phone with friends.

And at any job - you will get fired if you waste too much of your time. And I think it is only fair that the people who are paying you - know how you are spending your time.

i believe this to an extent.. yes you hire your babysitter to watrch your kids and such and even do some housework if need be expecially after herself and the kids but you cant expect the nany to be on her feet the whole day. when the kids are awake then yes the nanny should be playing with them and such but if they are sleeping being at night or in the afternoon then the nanny should get at least a half hour break. Everyone in the workforce gets breaks being lunch or coffee breaks so why shouldnt a nanny? a nanhy sleeping on the job or such is wrong but to sit and have a cup of cofee or read the newspaper should be ok for a nanny to do:)

i believe in the nanny cams and im a nanny/dayhome provider...LOL. and the nanny shouldnt be mad because if they are there playing with the kids and do activites with them then who cares...LOL.. some nannies m,ay feel diff but i think its a good idea. And im a nanny and a mother so i know it at both sides:)


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mckayleesmom
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 09:29 AM
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Well...I don't know what babysitter would leave the house in shambles....but I never did. I was never asked to clean, but I always tried to at least pick up what the kids got into and the dinner dishes...but I was in now way going to clean the rest of their house. Once the kids were in bed I watched tv or called friends or finished up my homework....I don't see anything wrong with that.


I did babysit for this one lady that had 4 kids, was single and working alot to make ends meet. Her house was in shambles and she was beyond behind on laundry....I felt bad for her so I did like all her laundry and cleaned her apartment from top to bottom......I didn't ask for anything in return and she really appreciated it....but she would have never asked me to...kwim?


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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 09:39 AM
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QUOTE (Jamison'smama @ Sep 14 2006, 09:20 AM)
Yikes. If dishes in my sink make for an unhealthy environment then I'm in trouble. laugh.gif I agree, as long as someone is taking care of my kids in a loving way I'm happy. I would love if the toys are picked up but beyond that isn't necessary.

I meant dishes that are just left there for long periods of time and bacteria has time to start breeding. I am an aboslutely neat freak though...And a germophobic.

I never expect the sitters to clean the whole house or do anything extra except keep the kids messes picked up that they made while she was there. However, if they did go above and beyond I paid them a lot of extra money. I remember I had a sitter come in on a Saturday while we were at a trade show and I came home to my entire house cleaned from top to bottom! I paid her $200 for the whole day which was like 12 hours. (And we normally only paid her $8/hour - she only requested $3/hour)

I am not a tyrant, I just expect the sitter to take care of what the children mess up while in her presence. And it's fine that she wants to relax a little after the kids go to sleep. Now I do feel strongly about the cell phones, and stuff because we have had really bad experiences with a couple of sitters.

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Boo&BugsMom
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 10:06 AM
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As a parent I love the idea of nanny cams, but I do not have use for one since I am an at home parent. If I had a full time nanny in my own home I would think about the idea heavily. With the way the world is today, I don't think you can be too careful. I would however, tell the nanny. I think it's only fair.

If I had a nanny, I wouldn't care what she did while the kids are sleeping (within reason of course) as long as I came home to happy kids and a cleaned up house that are taken care of. She could watch tv during nap the whole time for all I care or talk on the phone. That is what I would be doing if my daycare kids didn't nap in the living room and if I didn't come visit here. Working 55 hours a week with my kids, I think I would deserve a couple hour relaxation period during the week. So would my nanny. But that's my opinion. To each is own I think.

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Posted: Sep 14 2006, 10:32 AM
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I think regardless of what the nanny/sitter will be doing - it's important to go over what is expected, and what will not be accepted. If you expect the nanny to do the dishes and leave the kitchen spotless, then it should be laid out there so that it's completely understood. For sitters, I've always laid it out - put the dishes in the dishwasher after eating, have a pick-up time with the kids after playing, after they're sleeping go ahead and have a snack or a drink if you want one, you can talk on the phone since we have call waiting, you can watch tv, movies, whatever. I think that if the sitter is responsible (and I wouldn't hire one that wasn't), I would even allow the sitter to bring a friend, or a boyfriend, with limits of course... not while kids are awake, and definitely no hanky panky - to respect my home. But if the boyfriend is over and they watch a movie, big friggin deal. The sitter is there to stay with my children and make sure they're safe... not to sit on a chair looking at a wall until I get home.

I don't expect a nanny to do stuff that you yourself wouldn't be doing, you know? I certainly don't do laundry, go grocery shopping, do dishes, clean all day, etc etc etc while the kids are around... I usually wait until they're napping or in the evenngs... I wouldn't expect more out of my nanny than what I do myself.


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ashtonsmama
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 11:24 AM
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We've only hired a babysitter twice since Ashton was born, and both times I typed up a couple sheets saying what his bedtime routine was, what she could do (i.e. use our computer, I gave her the password, watch TV, etc.) and I told her she could eat anything in the house that was worth eating. She was very respectful of all of that, and she tidied up the house (just the things they were playing with and the video she watched) before we got home. IMO that is all I expect, unless I was specifically hiring someone to help with chores AND babysit, in which case I would tell them upfront what I wanted to have happen.

wink.gif

And from my own experience as a nanny, I agree with Becky on what should be said about expectations during babysitting/nannying.
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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 12:58 PM
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All I expect out of our sitters aside from taking care of andy is to pick up Andrea's mess they made while she was there as well. And as long as that is done, it is not as big of a deal what they do. I have just had a few sitters with Andy that would, since my husband worked at home a lot while I was in school, not take care of her, sit on the phone with the boy friend etc. And I have had a few of really good ones. We actually paid one of our sitters so well because she did do such a great job that she actually turned down a teaching job once she finished college because she was making so much watching Andrea on the weekend.

I had some bad bad experiences though - not only with the on the phone thing, turned out one babysitter wasn't who she told us, had one steal my pearl necklace that Andrew got me for Christmas and one that had her boyfriend over all day one day.

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Boo&BugsMom
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 01:00 PM
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QUOTE (mom2my2cuties @ Sep 14 2006, 12:58 PM)
We actually paid one of our sitters so well because she did do such a great job that she actually turned down a teaching job once she finished college because she was making so much watching Andrea on the weekend.

Can I be your nanny?! laugh.gif wink.gif


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mom2my2cuties
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 01:03 PM
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Sure you wanna move to TN - Mind you this is the same Nanny who wanted to work for $3/hour.

And kept trying to return money because we paid her $8/hour
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My3LilMonkeys
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 02:56 PM
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Personally, I wouldn't want to use one. If I don't trust the nanny/babysitter enough to be alone with my kids, they obviously aren't the right person to be watching my kids. So far I've only had family and close friends babysit though so it really isn't an issue at this point.

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holley79
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 03:15 PM
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We are working a case right now that involves a Nanny Cam. This sitter has been taking care of this families children for about 5 years now. This family has taken her on vacations with them and has been very trusting of her. Well they started finding things missing from thier bedroom. They set up a nanny cam in there, TOLD her it was there and she still stole. She turned the Nanny cam around but there was still audio. Needless to say she is in very hot water. On top of that now the sitter is talking about taking legal actions against the parents because of the Nanny Cam. HELLO, you knew about it.....

ETA: I would love to have a Nanny Cam where Annika is now that was a live feed just so I could see her during the day.

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MoonMama
Posted: Sep 14 2006, 05:29 PM
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Speaking as a former nanny. I have no problem what so ever with a nanny cam in the house, I think the parent have every right in the world to watch what is going on around their children and home. In fact after some cases I'm sure we have all read about or seen on tv I think they are a wonderful idea. thumb.gif I would certainly want to know if something horrible was going on around my child or happening to my child and nip it immediately!

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Posted: Sep 14 2006, 07:10 PM
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QUOTE (brookeandmadisonsmom @ Sep 14 2006, 05:56 PM)
Personally, I wouldn't want to use one. If I don't trust the nanny/babysitter enough to be alone with my kids, they obviously aren't the right person to be watching my kids. So far I've only had family and close friends babysit though so it really isn't an issue at this point.

Same here. IMO if you have to have a nanny cam then you have questions/reservations about that person to begin with which means I wouldn't be going with them. I love my dcp and even though we've had our issues off and on, she is a very big part of my kids lives and I feel very close to her for that.

If I was a nanny I could never work for someone who couldn't trust me enough to take care of their kids w/o a cam. There's HUGE trust issues there IMO.



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