I'm at a loss

[holley79]

I just don't know what to do. I find myself getting so frustrated with Annika at night. This is to the point where I put her in her bed, go into my room put a pillow over my head and just count to 100 instead of screaming. I have also gone as far as walking out the front door just to get some fresh air. I know I would never hurt my daughter but I just don't know what to do.

Lately we have been going to bed about 9 she will get up at 3. I normally bring her to bed w/ me and nurse her. Well lately she wants to play. I mean I know she is a baby and she is wanting to get into everything but I find myself wanting to "yell" at her and I have to stop myself. Someone please just tell me everything is going to be ok and she will grow out of this and I will get back to normal. I am seriously thinking I need to call my Dr and go talk to someone. I can't allow my emotions to take over and I just not be the mom that Annika needs. I know I'm not a bad mom but I also don't think my thoughts are very healthy either.

Edited for spelling.

This post has been edited by holley79 on Sep 28 2006, 01:50 PM

[Our Lil' Family]

99% of the time that I find myself wanting to yell at Thomas it is because I'm tired! And if you are saying it's happening at 3am....then that is probably the reason why!

Have you tried putting her back in her crib after you nurse? That way if she wants to play she can play until she falls back to sleep. Just my idea.

[kimberley]

i agree with Naomi.. honey, you haven't stopped in 9mos. you need a break to rejuvenate. i know that is far easier said than done but i am figuring out that the reason it takes me 6mos post partum to feel the PPD is because that is the point my body and mind "give up". just one good night of sleep or a night out to myself or a long stress-free shower is enough for me to feel okay. for you, it may be something different but it is the same idea.. you need to take care of you.

i am always around for you to talk to, but i strongly suggest you talk to dh about giving you a break. and if the syptoms persist, do talk to your dr.

[MomToJade&Jordan]

This too shall pass. This is my mantra. I've said it throughout Jordan's first year. We are 2 weeks away from being 1 and I still find myself saying this. You know she's a baby and you know that you love her, but she's going to aggrivate you. It comes with being a mom. It's normal to feel this way especilly when you're tired and you just want to sleep. Maybe putting her back in her crib after she eats will help.

[Maddie&EthansMom]

Holley that first year is incredibly difficult. I remember feeling this way many, many times b/c Ethan was just like Annika..he'd get up at 3 a.m. every morning like clockwork and it was all me. I did everything. Sleep deprivation can do some awful things to a person.

You have to juggle a lot. I really feel for you. You have to go to work, juggle home/work/family time. It is a struggle I'm sure, but you will make it, just hang in there. If you need to talk to someone, there's no harm in that.

[holley79]

Thanks ladies. I did try putting her in her crib since she was wanting to play but then it was on. She just started screaming like someone was twisting her toe. We would go through this for a little while then I would finally have to walk out for fresh air.

I am going to talk to DH about a night off when he gets settled back in. He's been gone for a week and just came back last night. He's going to have to give me a break. He gets them all the time. I feel so selfish saying that I need a night "off" but it's only fair.

[Hillbilly Housewife]

Absolutely... It's too the point where when Naomie wakes up at that time (which she usually does) we plop her between us and turn on the boob tube. She'll watch the tv while nursing (I'm sleeping already... ) and then she'll settle down and play with the sheets, usually peekaboo, until she notices we aren't playing too... then she'll whack us to wake us up or something... and then I put her on her back, pop a nip in her mouth, and away she goes... and if that doesn't work.... well dh takes her and bounces her around pretty quickly, takes about 4 minutes and she's sleeping again.

This too shall pass...Naomie's going to be 1 in one month.

[CantWait]

Holley, I can assure you this is just a stage she's going through. I know it's fustrating, but you're doing the right thing by going outside and taking a minute for yourself. Anthony did this also, most nights I'd just fall asleep with him still attached. You get the that you can, and she will grow out of it before you know it.

[luvmykids]

I still go through some of that, not at night but there are times I just want to scream. Not saying that to make you feel worse, just that it's pretty normal. I agree that you need time to refresh yourself and being tired makes most of us "monster mommy". I have to grit my teeth and count to 10 so many times throughout the day DH definitely needs to allow you time to regroup whether it's out of the house or time at home to just sit and veg. Hang in there, you're doing a better job at juggling it all than I could.

[garrettsmom]

Holley,

Garrett is going thru the same thing now too. I have a monitor next to my bed, and every night at 3, I hear him laughing! I walk in there, and lay him down, put a nuk in his mouth, and walk out the door. I have to do it 2-3 times, then he'll go back to sleep. He was like Annika a few weeks ago, though. But, I took a cue from supernanny, and just keep "Putting him back to bed", I've been consistent, and he's slowly learning to put himself back to work. Funny how they're the exact age, and so similar. It will get better. He was being very challenging today...so, I carried him out to DH, said I can't handle him right now, and went and laid down for a nap. Felt great!!! Good luck, pm me if you need to talk!

Mary

[moped]

Oh I am sorry Holley......what makes me feel bad foryou is that you don't get a break and I am guessing between workand Annika you don't get the sleep you need either. I feel that a good rest can make a mother more patient - and eating well............if I am tired or hungry - Jack and I will have a bad day.

It is just too bad that Americans don't get more mat leave............