Ok, I have another "hypothetical", about feedings....

Ok, if your "hypothetical" baby is say 4 months old today, and isn't sick. When it's feeding time, and they cry that they're hungry. Do you feed them Pedalite instead of formula? Like in case they're going to "refuse" the formula or something?

Remember, this hypothetical baby isn't vomiting and doesn't have diahara and is eating ok.

Um, no. If there is nothing to make me believe he will refuse the formula, then there's no reason not to give it to him.

Absolutely not.

no way. Formula (or breastmilk) should be the main source of nourishment for a 4 month old baby.

This post has been edited by DillsMommy on Feb 4 2008, 01:31 PM

Now, what worrys me about this hypothetical situation, is will this cause this hypothetical baby to fail to thrive?

Ok, I'm asking, for real. What the heck do you do?? Leave it alone and watch him possible not develop the way he should? Could that happen? Could him not getting the correct amount of formula stunt his brain developement, and growth in general? Do I say something to her? Call her doctor? Call Children's Services?

What would YOU do? Keep your mouth shut and turn the other way????

Children's services has already been to their house once for a different matter. If they take him out of the house, where does he go?

Help

Yes, it could harm him. Formula is supposed to have everything a baby needs to grow, develop and survive. I could not just "keep quiet" but I'm not really sure who you could contact.

Not knowing everything about the situation, it would be hard for me to say what to do. Calling child services is big deal stuff ya know?
Assuming that everything else is okay, for example, the child is clean, dressed appropriately, not showing signs of physical abuse, and that the mom is showing signs of properly caring for the child, like, the kid is in a rear facing bucket seat and things like that, and that the child seems to be developing normally, like is getting muscle tone, and starting to meet milestones, and isn't overly small, then I wouldn't really worry to much about it. I am guessing tho that this isn't the case.
I am not a feeding expert, but I will say that Baby's brains need a lot of fat to develop properly, and they need a lot of calories, and have delicate electrolyte balances that need to be kept in check, and pedialyte isn't intended to be a dietary supplement. baby's need their formula.
If your gut is telling you to do something, then I would listen to it.

Wow, yikes, ummm...yeah the baby should be getting ONLY breastmilk (the BEST) or formula for the first 6 months. There is NO nutrition in Pedialyte, and if a baby only drinks that, it COULD cause developmental harm if done long enough.

DEFINITELY say something to the parents. If they ignore you, I'd call Child Protective Services. They are denying that baby the basics it needs to survive (FOOD). A baby that young could get malnourished really fast.

I believe if the child is removed from the home they place him/her with a foster family. I'm not totally sure though.

Well I feel it depends on who or how the person is related to you. I would never say anything to someone who wasn't a close friend or relative. That's just me, but I agree with Tara....If you see the child is not in any physical harm and the child is thriving in other areas, then I wouldn't step in.

Are you sure it's not Pediasure? Not saying this is better than BM or formula, but just curious if you got the two mixed up. Sometimes this is used as a supplement if the child can't take anything else.

Ok, you guys are making me freak out (which is fine I guess, if I should be a little freaked out).


She did try to breast feed when he was born, but he wouldn't latch on. So now he's on formula.

I'd say he IS a bit small. Smaller then I remember Alyx being at that age. His head is small and limbs are skinny. He's not "chunky" if that makes sense. I suppose some babies just aren't right? Like his neck and stuff is real skinny.

I'm not around her enough (pretty much by choice b/c she drives me up the wall) to know how often she baths him, if he is changed regularly etc. Maybe I should start??

I know that when I took her to his surgen she had to give him a wet wipe "bath" in the car b/c in the 3 weeks since he had his surgery she hadn't really bathed him. She may of bathed him "down there" but that's it. He had food crusties on his head.

I know calling CPS is a big deal, which is why I haven't. (Even if somebody else already has). Plus I don't want to call all sorts of drama in the family. KWIM? I will if it becomes necessary though.

What should a JUST 4 month old be able to do?

Just as an aside. Her brother was taught to CRAWL at like 18 months old by the YMCA day care b/c he was never taken out of his pumpkin seat or swing. I know this b/c it was a friend that taught him to crawl and did call CPS on her mom.

Oh, and that reminds me. She's been having him sleep exclusively in a pumpkin seat (she has a crib and a pack n play). Is that bad?

Is Pedisure light colored and "fruity"?? B/c whatever she's giving him is like "juice" almost.

I don't know what a pumpkin seat is. Well from what you just wrote, that does seem pretty scary, but again, I would have a really hard time stepping in if it wasn't someone close to me. It's not that I don't care, but I'm not one to get into other people's business if they aren't you know, close. But is there someone else in the family you can talk to? Maybe someone else can do the talking or call CS.

Is Pedisure light colored and "fruity"?? B/c whatever she's giving him is like "juice" almost.

Nope, you were right then. Pedalyte is fruity looking and Pediasure is milky looking, like a shake. Ewwww. I feel so sorry for that baby. And YOU! Tough situation.

Is Pedisure light colored and "fruity"?? B/c whatever she's giving him is like "juice" almost.

no that does sound like pedialyte.
I don't know what a pumpkin seat is. There could actually be good reasons for a baby to be sleeping upright tho, like having reflux or something. And what kind of surgery did he have? 3 weeks is a looooong time to not bath a child.
Can you contact social services anonymously? Really, being in a foster situation may not be that bad if his home experience is that horrible. And maybe they won't remove the child, maybe they will just make the mom take parenting classes or something? maybe she just needs to be educated a bit.

I don't know what a pumpkin seat is, but if it's like a stationary seat thing or swing, that can't be good for him to sleep in.

Here's a link on milestones for a 4-month old: http://wwwils.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency...icle/002007.htm .

Keeping track of everything is a great idea. Get a notebook or something to write the date & what happened/what you saw in it. Just don't let the mom find it. If the need to call CPS arises, you'll have proof to get those kids help.

Like the detachable car seat. Does that make more sense?

Oh, and there's nobody really "close" to her. She has a rotten family where 1/2 of them have had their kids taken away. Her mom had like 5 or 6 kids and she has custody of none of them. Most are in different states. And "she" is my "almost SIL". Tim's youngest brother's baby's mama. (I'd say fiance, b/c they ARE engaged, but he keeps pushing back the wedding date (by years) b/c they don't get along).

It IS scary. I have no proof, but feel in my gut that the reason he's as sick w/RSV as he is b/c she didn't do what the drs told her to. They caught it really quick, but I seriously don't think she was suctioning his nose or anything like that.

Well, with that info, I'd be calling CPS. I wouldn't let that keep going on.

Is Pedisure light colored and "fruity"?? B/c whatever she's giving him is like "juice" almost.

no that does sound like pedialyte.
I don't know what a pumpkin seat is. There could actually be good reasons for a baby to be sleeping upright tho, like having reflux or something. And what kind of surgery did he have? 3 weeks is a looooong time to not bath a child.
Can you contact social services anonymously? Really, being in a foster situation may not be that bad if his home experience is that horrible. And maybe they won't remove the child, maybe they will just make the mom take parenting classes or something? maybe she just needs to be educated a bit.

Well they took parenting classes before she had him. But she has a learning disability. You wouldn't really know from talking to her (unless you actually pay attention to the retarded things she's telling you).

I agree that he should be sleeping on an incline (like put a pillow under his mattrace to elevate it) b/c he DOES have reflux. She doesn't feed him sitting up though. Cyndi told her to get the curved bottles and feed him actually sitting up so it doesn't come back up. We'd buy her the bottles if she'd want/use them...

He had the "extra skin" on his head "cut out". He had a birth defect where skin just stopped developing on his head and they didn't think it'd grow hair so they cut the bad part out. It was on the crown of his head. When she asked the surgen after he took the stitches out when she could get it wet. He looked at her funny and said "3 weeks ago when you brought him home you could get it wet"

So really, I think she just is ignorant. Problem is, you talk to her until you're blue in the face and she just continues on her way. She doesn't listen to ANYBODY. I keep telling her to talk to Sharon (our MIL) b/c she's raised 6 kids. She KNOWS what to do. Granted it's been 19 years since she had a baby, but still!!! Instead when they're over there to do laundry they sleep, they don't visit.

Sorry your going through this. That's a tough sitiuation to be in.

Thanks everyone.

I think what I'm going to do is try going over there (to check things out) and TALK to her and be frank, like "Listen, you can't give him that, you have to FEED him." She was feeding him mostly baby food like all last month and when they were at Children's the nurse told her he needed the calories from the formula and not to do that. So maybe, MAYBE she listened.

I don't want to "butt" in or anything, but I don't want to just let it go and something happen to him. I can't tell her how to raise her son, KWIM?

You have to do what you feel is right for the child regardless. Follow your gut, that will be the right decision. Even if you turn her in, at least you know that you have done something instead of just looking the other way.

As far as the seat, my kids slept in a carseat for months because they had reflux issues, it didn't hurt them in the least bit, then I did a wedge for the next few months and then moved on to the crib. Anyways, as far as everything else....oy I'm in shock. That baby definitely needs formula and not pedialyte, pedialyte could potentially harm a child if they are given too much especially if they are not dehydrated or have no diarrhea.

There's a big difference in raising a child and abusing/neglecting one, and she is definitely not raising him. I couldn't live with the guilt if he got really sick from being malnourished, so I'd have to really give it to her or call CPS. That might make me a b***h, but I wouldn't care.

Poor baby. He needs the milk. Pedialite is for temporary use.

see that's a toughie.

I didn't really bathe my babies, either, but when they were first born... and that's because their skin was so dry I was told to let it be for a while, just wipe when dirty with a cloth and warm water (from pee, puke etc) and just put moisturizer...

my kids ALL slept in their car seat for pretty much the first 4 months... they wouldn't sleep in their crib, in their bassinet, and the only other place they'd sleep was on our chests.... but my kids all walked early etc, so I know it didn't affect them...

I just re-read it all, and you mention she has a learning disability. Could it be that she just really doesn't know any better, and thinks it's ok because it's advertised as being good for them when they're sick etc? Maybe in her mind, he's sick and needs it?

You need to step in and tell her what she's not doing right... she may not even know. It's a difficult decision... but if it comes down to it... it might be better for the baby to be placed with another home.