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> Baby doesn't take bottle, How to get her to take it in public!
Cal&Camsmom
Posted: May 10 2003, 11:18 PM
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Well, today was our first ALL day outing since I had our daughter on 3/7. I pumped yesterday & a little this morning to be able to go out all day to the beach!! I haven't yet figured out how to bf in public in front of people. I have HUGE boobs (lol) & I don't have any nursing shirts. I haven't found any that are cute or are "me". So, I'm basically just wearing my dh's t-shirts, which aren't too easy to bf in (in public) w/o showing everyone my business lol. When she was hungry, we tried to give her the bottle & she wouldn't take it. Or, if she did, she'd fight with it the whole time. The only bottle she will take are the Avent bottles (but she has started to hate those now too). I ended up bfing her in the car. She takes them once in a while, it's just become recent that she hasn't wanted to take them. I'm a sahm mom (now! WOO HOO!) so, I'm home all day to bf her, so maybe she's just getting used to me.

Anyway...what I'm getting at is...how to get her to kind of ''get used'' to a bottle when we're out & about? I LOVE bfeeding her (I wasn't able to do it with my ds sad.gif ), but I'm not so great at the "public" thing. Any advice?



TIA!

Jenn blush.gif


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MommyToAshley
Posted: May 11 2003, 05:56 AM
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I understand, I don't feel comfortable BF in public either. When Ashley was younger, we had Daddy give her a bottle of EBM. I never gave her a bottle... I read that the babies will take it better from someone other than Mommy. You may even have to be out of her sight at first.

At about 6 months, we switched to the sippy cup, and she really likes the sippy cup. I know that doesn't help you now, but something to think about in a few months.

I still kind of time my outings where I won't have to feed her in public. At the mall, there is a store called Parisian that has a nice lounge in the bathroom. It is a room before you even get to the bathroom...so I go in there to feed her. If I am out someplace else, I would probabley do like you did, and feed her in the car.



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Joshua Lee 2/03/00 (Our Angel in Heaven)


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supermom
Posted: May 11 2003, 08:41 AM
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I never wore BF shirts either, just a larger T-Shirt or even a nice button down. (my breasts aren't exactly small either) and I would either just pull my shirt up enough to get them latched or throw a very lightweight blanket over my shoulder, not necessarily even covering the baby's face, either, just my boobies! All I can say is that it takes a little practice, and most people will NOT have a clue what you are doing. I know it's hard to get over being self-concious at first. Practice at home, if you can in front of a mirror, and just keep up until you are comfortable with it. Honestly, most people won't even know you are BF. I have had people come up to me at the mall (I sit on any bench I can find!) and ask if they can see the "cute little one". Only when I explain to them that he's eating, then they get a bit embarassed! laugh.gif I have seen several women out and about doing the same thing, but the only reason I know what they are doing is because I do it too. Otherwise, I would never be able to tell....

Oh, and BTW, Congrats on BF - it's a GREAT thing!!


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Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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paradisemommy
Posted: May 11 2003, 11:49 PM
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i am a sahm too and love breastfeeding. we had the same problem though - ds got so used to me that he wouldn't take a bottle so i tried just about every one under the sun and he ended up liking the gerber nurser (disposable bags) so that is what we use but i think the key is letting someone else feed the bottle because baby is extremely smart and won't take it from me. plus if he knew i was home than he wouldn't take the bottle either so i had to hide a couple times smile.gif. he only drinks milk from the bottle and drinks water from a sippy cup so you could also try those - they are made for as young as 3 months (non spill).
i still can't get myself to bf in public. i even bought a bunch of nursing tops and just can't do it. i usually end up feeding him in my car or finding a bathroom but it's frustrating when the bathrooms don't have anywhere to sit down.
don't know if this helped at all, but this is just my experience!! rolling_smile.gif
good luck!!


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razz05
Posted: May 12 2003, 06:16 AM
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Just a little tid bit to add to what these ladies said...

My Lactation Consultant told me to start giving a bottle around 4-6 weeks, and give him a bottle at least once a week. If he started refusing it, give it EVERY DAY until he was ok with drinking from it again. Then cut it down back to once a week. Also, I agree w/ what they've said... baby can smell you even if you're on the same floor of your house sometimes, so you may need to go OUTSIDE and have someone else give her a bottle. And eventually you might get to the point where YOU could give her one.

About breastfeeding in public... I BF my daughter until she was 3- 3 1/2 months old. I was NOT comfortable w/ it at all. Sawyer is now 3 1/2 months and we're still going strong. I got to the point in public where I'd do the same as you... HIDE. I was so sick of hiding that I finally just told myself... This isn't working... baby needs to eat too. So... the first few times I did it, I made sure hubby was with me. He would sit next to me w/ the blanket over us and after I got Sawyer latched on, he'd either bring the blanket down or take it off. It gradually got to the point where I just had the blanket there til he was latched, and now... after all the practice... I don't need a blanket at all. It wasn't easy getting to where I am now... but, you CAN do it! I have faith in ya smile.gif


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Kaitlin'smom
Posted: May 12 2003, 06:17 AM
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my dd wont take a bottle either, even daddy tried giving her one NOPE she wont have anything to do with them! So I usually try and feed before we leave but if she gets hungry I just feed her. It does not bother me at all to feed her in public. I just have to make sure I am wearing someting that I can feed her easier in. ( I dont use bf tops). I usually have on larger shirts or a button down with a tank top underneath so I am covered. And supermoms right most people dont have a clue. Or if they do they dont mind. I have had lots of practice feeding her around different people, It kinda botherd me in the beginning just beacause of the way I had to hold her after haveing a c-section, but once i could hold her across my tummy it was easy sailing.


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supermom
Posted: May 12 2003, 06:50 AM
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I am sooooo frustrated at a SOCIETY that makes our mom's so uncomfortable to BF in public - phoey on ALL of them.......

My hubby is from Sweden - over there, almost EVERYWHERE you see women BF their babes - it's just SO natural, that a woman wouldn't think twice about it because that's the way they are raised.........

Just makes me upset that one of the most NATURAL things in the world makes some of us feel like we've got to hide (and this is NOT a flame against you gals in ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM!!!) in order to take the right care of their babes!!!

All but one of mine would NEVER take a bottle, so we had no choice (we were pretty mobile, youngest one went coast to coast to visit friends and family before he was six months old).....and I just never was really uncomfortable with it - I have told a couple of ppl to stick it in their ear!! <rofl>


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Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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Hillbilly Housewife
Posted: May 12 2003, 06:57 AM
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QUOTE (supermom @ May 12 2003, 10:50 AM)
(we were pretty mobile, youngest one went coast to coast to visit friends and family before he was six months old).....and I just never was really uncomfortable with it - I have told a couple of ppl to stick it in their ear!! <rofl>

I was born in Germany, because my father was in the military, and that was where his posting was. So when his new posting back to Canada came along, I was only 3 months old, and my mother was still breastfeeding. So here are my parents, on this military plane, with all these other uptight men in uniforms, some sergeants, lieutenants, majors..and a Colonel.

My mom was quietly feeding me, while the dinners were being served to all the military men, and the breastfeeding was causing some discomfort among the military men, but no-one dared to ask my mother to stop. This was in the early 80's, by the way.

The Colonel gets up..this big huffing fat man...and asks my mother to go feed me in the plane's bathroom. My mother stands up as if to go... and says:

"You know what? YOU go eat YOUR dinner in the bathroom. My daughter has as much right as you do to have her dinner right here."

The Colonel turns BEET red, and skulks back to his seat. Some of the men were snickering... but it got her point across.

Just a little story I though you'd enjoy...especially you supermom!! laugh.gif


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supermom
Posted: May 12 2003, 07:07 AM
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QUOTE (~*~Zach's Mom~*~ @ May 12 2003, 09:57 AM)
The Colonel gets up..this big huffing fat man...and asks my mother to go feed me in the plane's bathroom. My mother stands up as if to go... and says:

"You know what? YOU go eat YOUR dinner in the bathroom. My daughter has as much right as you do to have her dinner right here."

The Colonel turns BEET red, and skulks back to his seat. Some of the men were snickering... but it got her point across.

Just a little story I though you'd enjoy...especially you supermom!! laugh.gif

GOOD FOR YOUR MOM!!!! Three cheers for her - that is wonderful!!!! Yep, I loved that story!!


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Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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Kaitlin'smom
Posted: May 12 2003, 07:36 AM
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ya pooy on society for tring to make up feel uncomfotable!

If someone said something to be while I was feeding I would tell them off! I love BF and sont mind on bit doing it in public! (sometimes not I have a hard time getting comphy while holding her, are goes to sleep but Its worth it to me!) baby.gif

Keep up the good work everyone!



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Di ~ mommy to Kaitlin wife to David
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Kaitlin'smom
Posted: May 12 2003, 09:10 AM
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QUOTE
You'll always get a jerk or two who get nasty and say rude things, I just look at them blankly, pop the babe off for a min, hold them up for that idiot to see them and say, "Now, could YOU starve this baby? Because all I'm doing is feeding my baby because they're Hungry. Don't YOU feed YOUR children when they're hungry?" And I pop the babe back on and walk away. I'm usually quite loud and vocal when I do this, I like causing a scene sometimes! lol, and a few times I've had ppl clap! lol


rolling_smile.gif emlaugh.gif rolling_smile.gif emlaugh.gif rolling_smile.gif emlaugh.gif

I just hope I could be that vocial if I ever run into that!


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supermom
Posted: May 12 2003, 09:24 AM
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You GO Teesa!! I could see you doing just that too -

The only time anyone has been truly RUDE to me was last summer at a football game (we went to see our kids play in the marching band, not really to watch the football game, it was hot and sticky - eeewww) and Anders was over 2. I just nursed him in the stands, and didn't think too much about it.....

When I got out to our car, there was a 'lovely' note written on a napkin, placed strategically under the passenger side windshield wipers........it said something to the effect of that I was corrupting my son (and their husbands) by continuing to BF my son well past the age of weaning (or something to that effect). I got SO mad, because they didn't have the guts to say it to my face, and it HAD to be someone who knew me to leave the note on our car....the more I thought about it the more upset I got. Then, all of a sudden it struck me as extremely hilarious that if I, by BF my DS, were corrupting THEIR DH's, then apparently their DH's weren't "getting any" (if you know what I mean) at home - and I just started laughing. My teenage kids thought I was nuts until I told them - they thought the note was really really stupid!!

I really wish that I would have kept the note, but I didn't.....I figure it would be good for a good laugh now and again.....oh, well......

As far as laws in the US, I know there are some in place, each state has their own. I had done some reading about it at lalecheleague.org but don't recall right offhand - but I have never been asked to leave or anything else anywhere. And I've walked down the isles of Wal-Mart with Anders sitting in the cart (when he was older) and he has nursed right then and there......I don't think they can charge "indecent exposure" and I know some states have more BF friendly laws than others, so if they don't and they arrest me, they'll have one heck of a fight on their hands!!! rolling_smile.gif



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Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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msjennbug
Posted: May 14 2003, 07:45 PM
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IME, the nursing shirts are LESS modest than just wearing a big shirt or button shirt - unless under a jumper!!

My advice is to use a sling. Even if you only use it while nursing. It can help you to feel more covered and secure that the cover wont fall off during nursing. I love our maya wrap b/c of the tail - it adds extra coverage smile.gif

I also second the advice to practice at home in front of a mirror. You may surprise yourself at how LITTLE actually shows. smile.gif

It's funny, with our first born, the first time I tried to nurse her (hours after birth, in our room) the dr walked in. I was so embarrassed I stopped and covered up right away. This was the DR that a few hours earlier had delivered that same child!

That nursing experience last ninedays and we didnt go anywhere in that time frame.

The second child was nursed a "whopping" seven days - of which we never left the house.

The third was my major breakthrough. smile.gif I remember the first time I nursed her in public. we had taken the kids to a fast food place that had a playground. It was AUGUST in TX (super-mega hot) and I was NOT going to the car to feed her! I sat in a corner with dh next to me, the sling AND a blanket. After that I started the practice at home in front of the mirror routine. since then, I nursed her and two that have come since - wherever they got hungry!

BTW, I know "big boobs" when nursing I'm somewhere around a 36G or H. with that said third child, I wore size 10 clothes BUT had to have size 16/18 shirts to accmodate said boobies.

Practice at home, use a sling and thumb your nose at anyone who may pass you a dirty look! smile.gif

Jenn
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Mommieto2Girls
Posted: May 14 2003, 08:25 PM
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All I can say is wow, after reading all that.After having Madison (had a c-section) i didn't get to see her for 4 hours and I think they gave her a bottle. I tried for 2 days to bf and she refused. The lactation nurse helped me try but said her mouth was so small , she might just be having a hard time latching on. She cried the whole time and finally they told me I should give her a bottle because she is to hungry. I was so upset. bawling.gif
Whats worse I had no shame trying to bf. I am a very shy person and I didn't care who walked in I was going to try, but it never worked out.
With the next one I hope I can bf.I am so happy for all of you, and don't let anyone ever tell you theres something wrong with what you are doing.If we weren't ment to bf then we wouldn't produce milk. Thats why we have it so why should it go to waste just because YOU don't think it looks appropiate in public.WTG to all of you ladies. biggrin.gif
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supermom
Posted: May 15 2003, 03:46 AM
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QUOTE (msjennbug @ May 14 2003, 10:45 PM)
Practice at home, use a sling and thumb your nose at anyone who may pass you a dirty look! smile.gif

ROFLMBO!!! I love it - you go girl!!! thumb.gif


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Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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Heather
Posted: May 15 2003, 06:09 AM
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I know the frustration. It took me 4 months to get Alison to take a bottle and finally a week before I had to go back to work, she took it!!! I heard that it is better for someone else to give the bottle as well...make sure you are out of the room and out of site. THEY KNOW!!! LOL!!! The first time I nursed in public it was very awkward...but I got use to it. Practice at home, once you are comfortable you will have not probs!!! And I got a few dirty looks too, I had one woman leave because she felt uncomfortable...I was totally covered up and you could hardly tell. I just laughed at her ignorance. I could care less what others thought.

I wish you all the luck with it. I know it is frustrating but give it time, it will happen!!!


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Heather
Posted: May 15 2003, 06:12 AM
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LOL I just thought of a strange place that I NIP...OKAY, I was at Home Depot!!! Can you imagine what was on the minds of all those men seeing some woman whipping her boob out...HEHEH. I had no choice but to walk around nursing her (it was a spur of the moment feeding)...I had her covered up...but I think it was a little more obvious than any other time.


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msjennbug
Posted: May 18 2003, 10:52 AM
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LOL... walking and nursing. smile.gif I've done that at walmart! Thank God for the sling biggrin.gif
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supermom
Posted: May 18 2003, 05:32 PM
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QUOTE (msjennbug @ May 18 2003, 01:52 PM)
LOL... walking and nursing. smile.gif I've done that at walmart! Thank God for the sling biggrin.gif
jenn

Actually, I've done that too, but used the cart for support; he would 'rest' his butt on the handle, I would cradle him as usual. I could never quite get the hang of sling and BF at the same time, he got frustrated, it was easier to do without. Of course, we didn't start out that way so that may have made the difference?


--------------------
Beverly, DH Eje, and mom to PJ, 20 Leah, 18 Sara, 16 Anders, 5
and Emily, almost 2

"A mother holds her children's hands for just a little while, but she holds their hearts forever."
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
"Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years."
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