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> Macho or Not so
A&A'smommy
Posted: Jul 1 2006, 01:07 PM
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well my husband is no really macho but he is definitly not a softie at ALL its very difficult sometimes. I would like to learn to be more understanding I feel bad for him because I tend to loose it with him and I really don't mean to I'm trying to be more understanding and I'm trying not to change him.


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Jamison'smama
Posted: Jul 1 2006, 08:12 PM
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QUOTE (redchief @ Jun 13 2006, 11:34 AM)
Good show J... I'm not so good at sweet and soft, though I do try. My analytical mind insists on getting in the way of my "inner emotions." My CISD counsellor says that's a defense mechanism I've built to deal with bad stuff that happens. dunno.gif

Just curious CISD = "Critical Incident Stress Debriefing"? I would imagine in your line of work ---that coping mechanism is absolutely necessary. I would also guess in DW's work/volunteering, she has to be much the same way at times. It's hard to shut that off.


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Brenda, a mom and wife in love with my family

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Brias3
Posted: Jul 2 2006, 11:54 AM
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My husband's a good combo of both. He's all macho but when it comes to the kids, he's really just a big softie wub.gif


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Bria,
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My3LilMonkeys
Posted: Jul 2 2006, 08:05 PM
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My DH isn't exactly macho - he's really kind of like a big kid to be honest. emlaugh.gif He has his tough moments, but they are few & far between.
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Jackie012007
Posted: Jul 2 2006, 08:17 PM
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my DF is weird, he's macho with the guys but a totaly wussy when he's around just me... whiney and lovey dovey, etc. But he is macho when he has to be, I guess tongue.gif He drives my dad crazy because my dad is THE MACHO MAN... hunter/fisher, works on cars, good with his hands etc and he desperately wants to bond with Carl, but Carl is more of an electronics/XBOX/ online geek, about the only outdoor macho thing he does is play paintball... but I love his dorkiness wub.gif


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Jackie - mama to Carly Evelyn (01-05-07) and Bride-to-Be (02-28-09)
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redchief
Posted: Jul 2 2006, 08:22 PM
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QUOTE (alyssa'smommy @ Jul 1 2006, 05:07 PM)
I'm trying not to change him.

This would be a very dfficult thing to do anyway. You might be able to temper his bahavior, but inside he'll still be who he is.


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redchief
Posted: Jul 2 2006, 08:26 PM
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QUOTE (Jamison'smama @ Jul 2 2006, 12:12 AM)
QUOTE (redchief @ Jun 13 2006, 11:34 AM)
Good show J... I'm not so good at sweet and soft, though I do try. My analytical mind insists on getting in the way of my "inner emotions." My CISD counsellor says that's a defense mechanism I've built to deal with bad stuff that happens.  dunno.gif

Just curious CISD = "Critical Incident Stress Debriefing"? I would imagine in your line of work ---that coping mechanism is absolutely necessary. I would also guess in DW's work/volunteering, she has to be much the same way at times. It's hard to shut that off.

I honestly think in her case it can be worse, though she may argue the point. See, it's okay for me to get mad when a person dies or and incident goes bad. She has to counsel people who have continually moved back into an abusive relationships, and she has to try to continue to be understanding and compassionate, in the off chance that person might actually stay away this time. I couldn't do what she does.


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Ed is husband to Lisa (since 1983)
Dad to Ricky, John, Erin and Kaitlin

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Jamison'smama
Posted: Jul 3 2006, 03:45 AM
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QUOTE (redchief @ Jul 3 2006, 12:26 AM)
I honestly think in her case it can be worse, though she may argue the point. See, it's okay for me to get mad when a person dies or and incident goes bad. She has to counsel people who have continually moved back into an abusive relationships, and she has to try to continue to be understanding and compassionate, in the off chance that person might actually stay away this time. I couldn't do what she does.

I understand DW completely but I would imagine she has found a way to compartmentalize those emotions as well. She has to see herself as a "seed planter" and it's easier to get through. I commend both of you for your dedication to others.


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Brenda, a mom and wife in love with my family

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