im having comunication issues

[luvbug00]

here is my issues and i'm clueless how to resolve them.

1. I have trouble telling people in general what hurts me. only when it's emotional. I just have trouble expressing it. how do you go about doing it?

number one is generally speaking the rest pertain to jon.

2. How do I tell him he doesn't have to do things and not make him mad.
the short of this is he has been out of work for a month now. He is part of a union so getting a new job would be a hit to his income. a big one. So he has been "living" with us and taking me to and from work. But also he feels this need to do everything, clean, cook, my and my laundry you name it. i dont know if this is a need to do work on some level or something but he is killing me! i want him to enjoy his time off and sure help here and there but not with everything! I dont want him to feel like im using him. how do i tell him this?

3. As we all know jon is a foreman for a pluming and ha-vac company. He is always seeing pluming and fixer upper situations. I mean he has mentally redesigned my entire bathroom! although again great..he needs to stop. i feel like i'm abusing the use of his trade..how to do i tell him this?

i think that's it for now..lol

[grapfruit]

I think JUST how you just told us.

Something like, "Honey, I just want you to know that I LOVE all the help around the house, but you need to understand that it is COMPLETELY unnecessary and I feel like I'm taking advantage of you being home. How about you slack a little and let me pick up some of that slack?"

And as far as the trade thing goes (my husband went to school for the same thing, nice to have those handy guys around:D ), I'd say let that part go unless it REALLY bothers you. Most people are proud of what they do for a living (otherwise they wouldn't be doing it). This is especially true when that person "does" a skilled trade. They ENJOY using it and showing it off. Unless his "design" is awful, why not? And I suppose if it DOES bother you, then say something like "Jon, what you're imaging for the bathroom is great, but I feel like I'm taking advantage of you!"

Basically, I think you know what to say, you're just chicken