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> Advice needed, Calebs first skating party
boyohboyohboy
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 05:03 AM
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Need advice..what would you do?

Ok we have been trying to reward Caleb with more freedom because his grades are great. I also want him to mature a bit and I don't see that happening unless I put him in some situations where he needs to make some decisions on his own.
The school holds a skating party each year. They pay for admission the kids pay for skates. They do not chaperone the kids. Soooooo....it's the age group of 3-5 th grade.
The problem is I work the weekend this is scheduled.
So, pete wants to take him, drop him off and then go get him.
I hate it when the kids are out while I am at work. Normally he keeps them at home.
So no siblings can go. So he can't be in the rink with Caleb.

My concern (because I always think the worst) is what if he falls, cracks his head and can't talk. How does anyone know who he is, who to call?
What if he is hurt?
Pete said, well the chances of that are slim so........
So what!!?
I don't think it's responsible to send your kid somewhere where no one can reach us if he needs us.

So what do I do
I initially said he can't go. Now I think I was to harsh.
I am worried.I will be a mess at work until he gets home.

I do have a cell he could take.  But that doesn't help us if he can't use it if he is hurt.



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Stacy, wife to Peter, mom to Caleb, Jakob, and Andrew

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amymom
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 05:38 AM
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The kids!!
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I don't get why a school would not have a chaperon.

That being said, if you feel he will be safe and he has friends going, I would let him go. Add id to his coat, If, a big if he were hurt, his friends would know who he was and the id would tell emergency personnel who he is.

Yesterday, Mary Beth went skiing with the ski club at school. I put a note in her backpack, in her pocket and attached to her coat that said:

Mary Beth lastname
home phone #
mom's cell #
dad's cell #

Now, Mary Beth is almost 14 but I have the same concerns as you. What if?!

He will have a great time and you being at work does not change how he will do. Your job is grow him into a confident, independent young man and you are doing a great job, so let him practice. He could take the cell and text mom or dad every few hours. But he may forget so don't hold too much stock in that.

Don't drive yourself nuts over it, it will get worse as he becomes a teen. You need the practice now too! lol

ETA: This is just what I would do, not telling you what to do, you know Caleb best. Also, I can't say that with Billy I would have confidently let him go. With Mary Beth I was/am more confident in her ability to make wise choices!!! It is never easy.

This post has been edited by amymom on Jan 16 2011, 05:41 AM


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Anne Marie
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boyohboyohboy
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 07:30 AM
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The school pays for the admission, or the rink maybe just gives it to the school for two hours, but teachers are not present.
I don't know any of the moms yet. This is the first function since we started this new school.
I am inclined to let him go. I will be totally grey haired when tis done!
I think he is doing better with making decisions. I do think he needs these experiences.
Wow is letting him go hard!


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Stacy, wife to Peter, mom to Caleb, Jakob, and Andrew

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bluebear
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 09:12 AM
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Wouldn't he be wearing a helmet on the ice? Every time I have been to an open ice, all the younger kids have bicycle helmets on.
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boyohboyohboy
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 10:09 AM
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No helmets, it's roller skating


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Stacy, wife to Peter, mom to Caleb, Jakob, and Andrew

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MommyToAshley
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 11:11 AM
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I know lots of Moms that drop their kids off at skating, swimming, etc. While Ashley makes good decisions most of the time (she still has her moments), there are certain things I don't feel comfortable dropping her off at... skating, swimming, and sports. These are places that I just think kids need supervision -- sometimes it is not even your own kid that you need to worry about, as other kids can be reckless--and these are places they can still can get hurt. I don't think I have ever been to the skating rink when someone didn't get hurt. However, I know I am in the minority and most parents don't have a problem with it.

Ashley has been disappointed a time or two because I couldn't go and would not allow her to be dropped off when her friends were allowed. She'll have plenty of opportunity to spread her wings at different events that I feel comfortable dropping her off at this age, and even some of these other places when she gets older. So, even if you decide not to let him go, don't beat yourself up about it, there will be plenty of opportunities for him to show his independence in the future. This is just one skating party.


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Dee Dee , Mommy to:
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Joshua Lee 2/03/00 (Our Angel in Heaven)


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mom21kid2dogs
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 06:33 PM
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My daughter wasn't at her girl scout skating party 5 minutes before she broke her arm. My husband thought I was kidding when I called to tell him to meet me at the ER instead of the rink. We, too, had a similar discussion because the party was 5-7 and I had to work at 6 so I told him he'd have to cover @ 6. He thought I was insane. Ours was a chaperoned event but I told him she needed a parent there incase she needed to be transported to the ER tongue.gif I'm not a helicopter mom by any means, especially now that she's 10. She walks her paper route by herself if she wants to. In cases where the chances are high she could hurt herself (like skating as she had never done it before), my rule is one of us has to stay.


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PrairieMom
Posted: Jan 16 2011, 08:09 PM
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Personally, for us, one of us would stay, or he just wouldn't get to go. It is just to dangerous, and really, I would feel uncomfortably leaving Ben in a place with little adult supervision
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msoulz
Posted: Jan 17 2011, 05:00 AM
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The teachers are not present but I am sure many parents will be present.

I had the same concerns with Jake when they had skating parties - plus more because my son is extremely competitive, was hanging out with the hockey players, and had not skated in a long time (i.e. has more guts that skills, lacks common sense when is challenged). It all turned out just fine.

We know they can be hurt really at any time. The odds of being hurt while skating, if one is not a skater, are a bit higher depending on the sense of the child.

It is really tough to let them fly a little on their own when so young. But it does get easier once they prove they can do it.


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MommytoKKC
Posted: Jan 17 2011, 04:56 PM
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My girls school hosts a skating party every month. It's through the school, but no school teachers are there. So nobody is in charge of your kid if you don't go. I never drop them off, because as many other people have mentioned, a lot of kids get hurt. I never even take my eyes off of them while I'm there to make sure they are not horsing around, playing tag or something unsafe.

Is there another parent you would trust to take him? That is the only way I would let my girls go. Otherwise, I think you should stick to your decision and keep him home. You would never forgive yourself is something happened.
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msoulz
Posted: Jan 18 2011, 05:49 AM
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QUOTE (MommytoKKC @ Jan 17 2011, 08:56 PM)
You would never forgive yourself is something happened.

That is a true statement, no matter what side of the debate one is on!


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Mary :)
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