Parenting Club Forums [Powered by Invision Power Board]

Printable Version of Topic
Click here to view this topic in its original format

Parenting Club Forums > Parenting Children 4-7 Years of Age > What else can I do?

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 07:37 AM

Kylie is my messiest child ever. That child can't go 10 seconds without getting something all over her clothes. Drives me nuts, I tell ya! And everything she gets on her clothes never seems to come out.

This morning after she ate her breakfast she asked if she could have 2 chocolate covered strawberries that they had made yesterday for me. I said yes. She gets done eating them and stands up and there is chocolate finger prints all over her pants.

So of course she had to go change before school.

I've tried everything to get this child to use a napkin. I've put them in front of her and constantly reminded her. I've done anything and everything.

Nothing works.

I was so annoyed this morning I told her I'm going to start making her wear a bib if she's not going to use a napkin. She was upset, which in turn made me feel bad. I didn't mean to, I was just so over the edge on this issue.

I used to make her eat breakfast before putting on her clothes, but it just never seems to work out in the time issue before the bus. Her sister is perfectly capable of using a napkin and keeping her clothes clean and she's 4!

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: DVFlyer Feb 16 2010, 07:49 AM

Short of eating with no clothes or junkie clothes, I think it's just a phase. (also- see my signature).

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 08:00 AM

QUOTE (DVFlyer @ Feb 16 2010, 10:49 AM)

Short of eating with no clothes or junkie clothes, I think it's just a phase. (also- see my signature).

So...you think humiliation would be a bad thing?

I could see it as a phase if my other one did it, kwim?

Posted by: jcc64 Feb 16 2010, 09:20 AM

I'm an unapologetic slob, so I'm in no position to offer any advice--sorry!

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 09:28 AM

QUOTE (jcc64 @ Feb 16 2010, 12:20 PM)

I'm an unapologetic slob, so I'm in no position to offer any advice--sorry!

There's one thing to be a slob, but I'm sure you use a napkin right? That's all I'm asking from her.

Posted by: DVFlyer Feb 16 2010, 12:00 PM

QUOTE (coasterqueen @ Feb 16 2010, 08:00 AM)

I could see it as a phase if my other one did it, kwim?

As much as every child is the same, they are also very different...

It's a phase. At some point, appearance will become more important to her and she will change. May not be the way you would change, but she will change. Very few adults are sloppy and mark on their clothes etc.

Or maybe she'll be this way for the rest of her life. /sarcasm.

All you can do is be consistent. It may not help, but it will show her that you are true to your beliefs which is a larger, more important lesson to teach.

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 12:26 PM

QUOTE (DVFlyer @ Feb 16 2010, 03:00 PM)

QUOTE (coasterqueen @ Feb 16 2010, 08:00 AM)

I could see it as a phase if my other one did it, kwim?

As much as every child is the same, they are also very different...

All you can do is be consistent. It may not help, but it will show her that you are true to your beliefs which is a larger, more important lesson to teach.

OMG if she stays this way forever she'll never get married and give me grandchildren.

This child is the sloppiest, not-matching, doesn't care what her hair looks like at all kinda gal. She farts 24/7 as loud as she can and doesn't care if it's in class or at home. No matter what we've told her about being polite, etc.

I'll go with it's a "phase" and pray it's just that.

Posted by: PrairieMom Feb 16 2010, 12:26 PM

we do the eat in our jammies thing. ben is 6 and has yet to figure out how to hit his mouth with his food and keep his sleeves out of his plate .

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 12:27 PM

QUOTE (PrairieMom @ Feb 16 2010, 03:26 PM)

we do the eat in our jammies thing. ben is 6 and has yet to figure out how to hit his mouth with his food and keep his sleeves out of his plate .

We would do that but Kylie is also one that takes FOREVER to do anything. The kid takes a 30 minute shower because she gets distracted.

I used to have her eat breakfast first then get dressed, but she was always running behind. This way if she's dressed first and running behind then she only gets so much to eat and that's that.

Posted by: DVFlyer Feb 16 2010, 12:56 PM

Should have asked this first...

How old is she?

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 16 2010, 01:48 PM

QUOTE (DVFlyer @ Feb 16 2010, 03:56 PM)

Should have asked this first...

How old is she?

7.5

Posted by: my2monkeyboys Feb 16 2010, 01:55 PM

Maybe in the mornings during school just offer non-messy items for breakfast.... like pop-tarts or toast. Just things that may make crumbs, but not actual stuck-on food. If she only gets that kind of thing for a while then maybe it'll motivate to eat neater so she can have better food??

Posted by: jcc64 Feb 16 2010, 02:35 PM

QUOTE

I'm sure you use a napkin right?

Most of the time...

Seriously, my now 14 yo son used to use the collar of his shirt as a napkin, or to occasionally chew on if he was bored. So what you're describing sounds pretty minor league, by comparison. Even he grew out it eventually.

Posted by: kimberley Feb 16 2010, 03:19 PM

wake her up earlier and let her eat in jammies. if that doesn't work, let her go to school with jam/berry pants. she won't do that too many times.

and ftr, my 13yo son also still thinks his sleeve is a napkin

Posted by: Nina J Feb 16 2010, 04:58 PM

Does she have a dressing gown or a robe? Why not put that on her while she is eating breakfast. Or just don't dress her until she is done eating. Shower, etc, but just have her stay in her underwear and singlet until after she has eaten.

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 17 2010, 06:07 AM

Thanks everyone. I've tried waking her up earlier and letting her eat in her jammies, doesn't help. I tell you I have to be major drill sergeant in the morning to get that child to school on time no matter what time we get up.

Megan's not like that, thank goodness - at least I have one I don't have to be that way with.

I've also tried the robe over the clothes and she complains she's too hot, etc, etc.

I'll just continue to nicely remind her and hope she grows out of it.

Oh and I have let her go to school in her clothes after she's used them for napkins. I did this for weeks on end and the child did not care in the least bit.

Posted by: PrairieMom Feb 17 2010, 06:36 AM

Karen I was thinking about you this morning. When I was shoving Ben out the door for school.
His issue is he won't get dressed. Every morning I am literally yelling at him every 5 minutes to get him out the door. you would think that after 1 1/2 years of constant yelling every AM he would get it, but he hasn't.

So I am switching things up, and now I am making him get dressed first before breakfast.

Thanks for the inspiration. He may go to school covered in oatmeal, but I hope that the threat of starvation works a bit better than me screaming all the time.

Posted by: MommyToAshley Feb 17 2010, 07:00 AM

You could get one of those painting smocks and put it on her when she's eating.

Ok, probably not the answer you were looking for.

Ashley uses a napkin for her hands, but she still seems to miss her mouth a lot. I have to tell her to wash her face before going to school, and when she comes home, I can tell what she had for lunch by looking at the ring around her mouth. LOL. It DRIVES me batty. I never have to tell her to wipe her hands, but I am always telling her to use a napkin to wipe her face....out of sight out of mind, I suppose.

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 17 2010, 07:11 AM

QUOTE (PrairieMom @ Feb 17 2010, 09:36 AM)

Thanks for the inspiration. He may go to school covered in oatmeal, but I hope that the threat of starvation works a bit better than me screaming all the time.

Glad I could help. Hope it works. Not to be a bummer, but it didn't work for me.

Kylie would just turn around and eat breakfast at school and I had no clue until I realized her lunch money was going fast. So then I stopped that and she'd rather starve than rush.

Posted by: mummy2girls Feb 17 2010, 07:32 AM

QUOTE (coasterqueen @ Feb 16 2010, 03:26 PM)

[QUOTE=DVFlyer,Feb 16 2010, 03:00 PM] [QUOTE=coasterqueen,Feb 16 2010, 08:00 AM]

I could see it as a phase if my other one did it, kwim? [/QUOTE]

OMG if she stays this way forever she'll never get married and give me grandchildren.

Im sorry to laugh but this is Jenna to a tee. She will get food all over her shirts and pants. Chocolate is the worst! She does have eating issues but that more of using her fingers rather her silverwear. and some foods can be messy for her because of the issue so i try to work with her but its frustrating for sure! She doesnt care about what she is wearing either. she will actually roll her jeans up to her knees to look like capris every mornings he dresses...UGH. She farts non stop as well...which is funny when it happens because its usually on marcus she lets it go so to me its funny but to him not so much!! She is for sure the gassiest girl i have met! She even did it in church one time which was a bit amusing...LOL... i am hopeing for the same as well!

Posted by: amymom Feb 17 2010, 08:01 AM

I haven't had the trouble with the food on the clothes. But when Billy had trouble getting moving, we got a timer and for the morning we scheduled the routine. We sat down and he said how much time he needed for each task that had to be done and we guided him. And we scheduled everything from 5 minutes to brush teeth and use bathroom, to 7 minutes to complain about not getting out of bed. Then we figured it backwards and put him in control of the timer. We were fortunate in that he wanted 15 minutes of TV time, so that was at the end and that is what lost if he dilly-dallied on any of the other items. It wasn't always smooth sailing, but it worked well for us. It helped that I am a person who likes to get up early so I always had extra time in the am. Billy is now at college on his own, and I have not heard that he is missing any of his 8am classes so it must be all good. lol.

As to differences, Mary Beth just does this normally and gets it all done in the morning without much help or pushing.

Good Luck Karen!

Posted by: PrairieMom Feb 17 2010, 08:07 AM

QUOTE (coasterqueen @ Feb 17 2010, 10:11 AM)

QUOTE (PrairieMom @ Feb 17 2010, 09:36 AM)

Thanks for the inspiration. He may go to school covered in oatmeal, but I hope that the threat of starvation works a bit better than me screaming all the time.

Glad I could help. Hope it works. Not to be a bummer, but it didn't work for me.

Kylie would just turn around and eat breakfast at school and I had no clue until I realized her lunch money was going fast. So then I stopped that and she'd rather starve than rush.

That won't be an issue for us. We drive him to school, and breakfast is done by the time he gets there. He's boarder line tardy nearly every day.

Posted by: mckayleesmom Feb 17 2010, 05:05 PM

Buy her a cute little apron....They have some cute ones at Books a Million right now....I bought Mckaylee one a while back from the dollar bins at target...Maybe that would help.

Posted by: luvbug00 Feb 17 2010, 06:59 PM

mya is 9 and takes FOREVER to do anything and everything!
She doesnt even make it to sit down to breakfast, she munches on oatmeal bar on the way out the door. Hates having her hair touched ( that i think is from me dooing her hair allll the time when she was little in complicated hairstyles. she would sit in the chair getting her hair done for an hour or more)
But mya isn't ur average farter, she will back up on you and make truck back up noises and then will fart ON you. yep my kids a class act!

Posted by: MommyToAshley Feb 17 2010, 07:03 PM

QUOTE (luvbug00 @ Feb 17 2010, 10:59 PM)

But mya isn't ur average farter, she will back up on you and make truck back up noises and then will fart ON you. yep my kids a class act!

Posted by: coasterqueen Feb 18 2010, 07:21 AM

QUOTE (luvbug00 @ Feb 17 2010, 09:59 PM)

That's my girls too. They also both think they need to role around in our bed naked before they get in the bath - they think it's funny.

Kylie has NEVER EVER sat long enough for me to do any kind of hairdo. That child hates to have her hair done.

I like the apron idea Breanne. I may just go to the hobby store this weekend and see if I can find some the girls can decorate. That should make them more excited about wearing them.

Posted by: bluebear Feb 18 2010, 02:53 PM

QUOTE (coasterqueen @ Feb 18 2010, 10:21 AM)

I like the apron idea Breanne. I may just go to the hobby store this weekend and see if I can find some the girls can decorate. That should make them more excited about wearing them.

Michaels has those in child sizes in the t-shirt isle with the fabric paint!

Posted by: luvbug00 Feb 18 2010, 06:15 PM

i heart michaels!!