Dana's TTC thread, in order to save space

I'm sorry. I know that I've had a lot of times when I wanted to be pregnant so bad that I got every symptom in the book, but I wasn't pg. Your mind can do tricky things to your body! I'll be praying for you - I hope you get pg soon!

Dana I read this in Melany's thread but I wanted to put my reply in here so that you'd see it. How long have you been TTC? Just because you've had a chemical pregnancy doesn't necessarily mean that there isn't anything wrong. It means that you CAN get pg, but there could still be something that is making it hard for you to get pg and hard for you to keep the baby that might be fixable. I'm not saying there is anything wrong, but I think I'd ask your OB again to do some tests to be sure.

We've probably really tried for a year. I told Richard today that we have to have some tests done if we don't get pregnant this time. I'm just hoping it will happen this time.

For some reason I can't the smily's to work but Just want send you some (((hugs)))

Yes, I'm always open to hugs...

and baby dust coming your way. At least if you get tests done, you can find out if there is any cause for concern, and if there is, fix it. And if there isn't, it'll be a relief to know that it can (and will) happen

I'm just gonna butt in here but to you. I would definitely talk more to you dr and, if you can, maybe get a 2nd opinion. Something similar happened to my SIL; her first dr told her everything was fine, it would just take time. Then she got a couple of different opinions and was given some other things to try. She had cysts and they even tilted her uterus to help with conception. Baby vibes to you. Another thing, and I don't mean to come off harsh or anything, but you really should try not to stress so much. That amount of stress and worry isn't going to help you. I know many people who were TTC and they worried and fretted and got upset with every AF, but once they decided to stop "trying" so hard....bam! it happened for them and they were so shocked. All of them said that if only they had known to just stop stressing, they would have done it ages before. I'm sorry if I offended you or anything, I just thought I'd try to help. Let me know if you don't want it. My DH tells me that I can be kind of brutal sometimes....I don't mean to be though. and baby dust to you!

You weren't brutal, and I have actually heard that before. I came across a big article a few weeks ago, though, and it said stress doesn't cause infertility. You get stressed when you don't get pregnant, so maybe that's where people correlate the two. Without going into a lot of detail, I can tell you that I have a lot of problems with sex. So I'm not one of those people who can just do it and relax. Yes, I'm in therapy....well, at least I was until my therapist got too busy. Anyway, that's what I'm working with right now. I think I have progressed some....I used to cry every single time we had sex, but now it's only sometimes. Believe me, it's an improvement. It's not that I don't love my husband--I don't want anybody to think that. It's just something that has to be healed in my heart, and that's gonna take a little while.
Anyway, it's almost time to start trying again. I just hope I'm not sick much longer

Dana - you don't "have" to have sex to get pregnant. I know that's where a lot of issues are for you two... and I don't mean to be TMI here or too graphic... but just getting some little soldiers in there could do the trick. It doesn't have to be via penetration, if you kwim.

And I would definitley get a second opinion. At the very least, if you'r enot already, ask about Clomid.

Thanks....I will look into it.
I know we don't have to have sex, but I do love my husband. He never pressures me because he knows it's hard for me. Because he's so understanding, it really makes me want to try for him. I do want him to be happy, you know?
But I will ask about getting checked out if we don't get pregnant this time.

first I want to offer some seconds I dont mean to be harsh but no wonder your not getting PG, not only do you have issues with sex but your so stressed about both sex and getting pg that its just not happening. like Rocky said you dont have to DTD to get PG just got to get some of those guys in there at the right time. I dont know the issues you have but if you cant realx and enjoy sex with your DH how do you really expect to get PG? I am sorry its not happing and sounds like maybe if you take a break from tring and heal it might be better when you try again.

I guess I didn't realize you have to be relaxed to get pregnant. Pregnancy sometimes results from rape, and I know that's not a relaxed situation. I do understand what you're getting at, and I hope you believe I've been trying...and I will continue to do that.

Sorry hon I know your probably so frustrated, and it sounds like not only need to realx but see out help and make sure there is nothing going on. BTW have you taken test to make sure your not PG you said you BB are sore and that never happens, you never know I did not learn I was PG for months I was nearly 5 months pg before I found out I was PG and believe me not only was that a shock but we were not tring.

Thanks...I thought of that, but I just had my period and a lot of cramping (as usual). My temps are back down, as they always are before ovulation...I doubt I could be pregnant, given these facts. Believe me, it crossed my mind. I just didn't let myself dwell on it, knowing it was highly unlikely.

well I had my AF for the first 3 months its not till I missed month 4 that I realised something was up.

Did you just bleed or was there cramping too?

never had crapimg issues till after I had my daughter. But yes I bleed just like the reg AF

I agree that you have to be relaxed about it. A past co-worker of mine - her and her husband tried for years to get pregnant only to have several miscarriages. At that time they were just going with the flow and what happened happened. After many miscarriages they went to a specialist who had them both doing things that drove them crazy. They'd have to have sex then immediately get to the doc office where they'd do things (not sure what). He had to use a cup then they would do whatever. YKWIM. They tried it all. They were on the verge of divorce because they were so stressed out 24/7 when they decided to quit trying all together. They even didn't have sex for a few months and just reflected on the other parts of their marriage instead. After a few months hiatus they started having sex again, their marriage was less stressed and VIOLA! she got pregnant unexpectedly. She has a beautiful 5 year old girl now. All that stressing did them no good. Once they stopped they were able to get pg.

Just try not to stress. I know it's hard.

Dana, I had my AF with my kids too for the first couple of months.

Did you just bleed, or was there cramping too? see, I have bad cramps with my periods, and I don't see how there could be a fetus after all that. I'd love to believe that's what's going on, but i think it would be a miracle.

I know this isn't exactly what you're asking but I had cramping in the beggining of all three of my pregnancies - one of them ended in a m/c but the other two were healthy. Some cramping is normal because of the changing going on in the uterus. I don't know about bad cramps though.

It was bright red blood and bad cramps...when i miscarried, i bled for 12 days...my norm is 4 days. This last one was about 3 1/2. The thing that could not be explained is the low temps. I should have high temps if i'm pregnant.
I called my doctor's office and asked what i need to do to set up testing for us. A nurse is supposed to call me back. Of course, that probably means i will be calling them back tomorrow

I don't have any advice or anything, it sounds like you've been through a lot and I just wanted to send hugs.

Thanks Joni!
My doctor's nurse called and I have an appointment on May 4th. I'm a little nervous, but at least maybe we will be on the road to knowing something.

cool...well i hope its your ticket to a BFP this month...i'm waiting on AF here anyday...shoulda been here today...but that doesnt always mean anything!