Does your child lie?

School children are usually either silent or lie about grades and disciplinary violations at school.
I used to hide the lower grades from my parents (otherwise I was an excellent pupil), and when they would ask specifically, I lied. The reasons for this were too sharp punishments, both physical and psychological. It is terrible when a mother does not speak with her child because of grades lower than expected. So I would buy the time, sometimes I improved the assessment before the lie was uncovered.
I have been teaching for quite some time and I found that many children lie to avoid disappointing their parents who have unrealistic expectations, compared to the real possibilities.
From both experiences, I know for certain that the children are very unhappy when they lie to their parents. The first reason is that they are not able to resolve the problem (a bad grade, a conflict in school) by themselves, but they cannot seek the help of parents because they had lied to them. Another reason is the constant fear of the reaction of what will happen if the lie is uncovered. They become absent minded, learn less and enter a vicious circle of failure and lies.
Does your child lie? Why?

This post has been edited by znljubica on May 15 2011, 06:31 AM

I totally agree with you on your perspective on why children lie.

Sometimes parents place impossible expectations on their children (subconsciously) to make up for what they have lacked or missed out in their own lives.

Any deviance from the expected path that they place their child on will result in harsh physical OR psychological punishment.

What really worries me if they are really caught in the cycle of "chronic lying" and it will definitely be an issue for them in the future when they grow up to be adults.

The sad thing is, this is an issue which more than likely, COULD'VE be avoided.