Not sure if this is PPD or not?

[3xsthefun]

I kinda feel embarassed putting this here. But I felt like I needed talk to some one and just been feeling like I have been in a funk. Not sure how to explain this.

It just seems like I have been so emotional. Just the smallest thing will have me in tears. I don't feel like doing anything around the house. I have to push myself to do any type of house cleaning. I hate having that our house is so cluttered but I won't do anything about it.

I love my husband dearly, but seem like some things he does just get me so angry. I don't want him touching me one minute, but if he doesn’t touch me then I feel like he doesn't find me attractive anymore. I know that probably doesn't make any sense.

I feel so ugly and fat right now. I lost 30 lbs after I had Ryan but I'm pretty sure I've gained half of it back now. But I don't do anything to loose the weight. I don't eat right I know. I will skip breakfast and sometimes lunch and then eat lot at dinner. I know it is not healthy. Just sometimes it seems like it takes to much effort to even make something to eat. I know I could do better and take walks with the kids. I just need to push myself to do it.

Another thing is I feel like I'm stuck in this house all the time. We currently only have on vehicle we drive. Because of gas and plus Rob needs to drive it to work. And well we need to buy another one but just haven't yet. Not really sure when we will. I live to far to really walk anywhere so that is out of the question.

Actually, we did go out today for a while and I had to push myself to do that. I didn't even feel like going. But I told myself I needed to get out of here. We did and Rob and I got into a little bit of an argument, wasn't really his fault. It was just I thinking he was trying to tell me what to do. When he wasn't even doing that. I don't even want to say what it is about because it is just too stupid.

Also, sometimes I feel myself loosing my temper with the kids or Rob. But lot of times I try to hold it in.

Last thing, I have a really hard time sleeping at night sometimes also. Not sure why I think it is mostly cause I'm worried about Ryan. He is doing better at sleeping at night. But I keep thinking he is going to wake up any minute.

Not sure if this made any sense at all or this needs be moved somewhere else. But I thought I'd put it here.

This post has been edited by WVmommie on Sep 3 2007, 04:40 PM

[ZandersMama]

i'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I think that if you are feeling so down it may be time to see someone, even just to get it all off your chest. And maybe you should mention it to your husband too, then maybe he will be more understanding

[lovemy2]

Sounds exactly like what I went through after Dylan - the second child was a REAL kicker for me - I went on Wellbutrin XL - it helped take the edge off but I also went to counseling which I think is helping more than the meds - it is helpful to vent to someone uninvolved - talk to your OB - but do it now before it gets worse - you did the right thing getting it out - we are here to help and many of us have been through it or are going through it - there is help out there so reach out and get it - KUP and I hope you feel better soon

[luvmykids]

A big sign of depression is no energy and feeling like you just don't want to do a thing, even things you used to enjoy. You're describing how I felt after Macie, it was literally ALL I could do to keep the kids fed and clean, forget the house, meals for me and DH, showering, etc. I hope you feel better to know you're not alone, I'd talk to someone

[Kirstenmumof3]

It sounds like you might me experiencing some PPD. I would talke one of the tests and take the results in when you go and see your doctor again. It might be just something as simple as taking some time for yourself ie. going to browse at the bookstore, going for coffee with a friend, doing some window shopping or if you are up to it having a manicure or pedicure done. Just something to pamper yourself for a few hours! I hope you start feeling more like you soon!

[3xsthefun]

Thanks, everyone. I also think I need to talk to someone. I plan on doing that soon. And I do think I need to talk to my DH about it also. I'm sure he is wondering what is going on with me. I felt so bad today for getting mad at him.

I've had problems with depression in the past. Especially after our house fire back in Dec 04'. I was really hoping it would not come back. But I guess it has.

[Sam & Abby's Mom]

I would definitely call your OB to discuss it. Sounds like it could be PPD.

Good luck and keep the Faith !

[mysweetpeasWil&Wes]

Sounds like what I went through after having Wesley. I would go talk to your OB. They seem to know the most about PPD. You could also go to a GP. I was on Lexapro for a few months, but not anymore. It really did work. But I stopped taking it as soon as I started feeling better, which I must say, took at least a year PP.

[A&A'smommy]

I agree you probably need to call your ob and let them know!! I'm sorry your going through this!!!

[kit_kats_mom]

Geez, I could have written that...except for the car part...and we even had a car but I still didn't want to go out.

I'm on meds now. I finally made the call after a massive panic attack and realizing that I really lost my temper with the kids one day. Now I'm much better. Some days are better than others but for the most part, the real funk is gone.

As far as the house, try flylady. I'm telling you, it really helped me to pull myself up from the doldrums.