Ashley's kindergarten teacher passed away

[MommyToAshley]

The church is having the services on Thursday. The entire school will attend, unless you opt out of it and come pick your child up. I am thinking that I will let Ashley go, but I think I will go there with Ashley as she has never been to a funeral (except when she was too young to know what it was), and she is pretty heartbroken as she loved her kindergarten teacher. Anyone have any advice how to help Ashley deal with it?

Also, I have never attended a Catholic Funeral Mass, what should I expect? Is there any customs that I should be aware of? I wouldn't want to be disrespectful.

[luvmykids]

Poor Ashley! I hate these losses for kids I don't have much advice, when the kids lost one of their grandfathers it was very sudden and there was no way to make it to his funeral so in a sense I think it was easier to deal with since we didn't go to the funeral...for me, that's the part that makes it really sink in.

Because of our faith, we focus a lot on that aspect of it...that we'll see them again and how wonderful things must be for them in Heaven. We talk about how we hurt and miss them but know that we have amazing memories tucked away and that talking about that person is GOOD, it means they were an important part of our lives.

As for the Mass, it's definitely different but there's nothing you need to worry about doing or not doing, just follow along where you're comfortable and don't if you're not.

I'm sorry for Ashley

[msoulz]

Regarding the Catholic funeral - expect it to be no less than an hour, probably more. There is standing, sitting, standing, sitting, and depending on the church maybe some kneeling. You can follow the crowd on those and all will be well.

Most of the service will be a normal mass with talk of the deceased in the priest's homily and at a couple of other points.

There is one point where the priest tells the congregation to give each other a sign of peace, and people shake hands with those around and say "peace be with you" - but I have also seen that skipped in today's germophobic society.

There will be communion, but you can just sit tight and let others pass by.

Overall, don't get too anxious - there will be many non-Catholics and most Catholics understand that not everyone knows the routine! The important thing is that you are there!!

I have no idea how to ease Ashley's sadness. Just take lots of tissues and she'll work it out in her own way.

[A&A'smommy]

no advice just prayers!!

[mckayleesmom]

Tons of prayers to the teachers family, friends and former little students....so sad.

[Maddie&EthansMom]

I'm sorry to hear this. That is so sad!

I think it's wise of you to go with her.

[bluebear]

Very sorry. My brother's 2nd grade teacher died in an awful car accident a year later after he had her and the entire school had memorial services throughout the rest of the year.
I would sit with Ashley and write things about her that she remembers, whether it's about the class and all the things they did like trips, parties, special projects, special days (100th day of school) and if you still have some of her school work bring those out and look through it.
Losing a kindergarten teacher is way tougher than losing another teacher because you began school with them. (imo)

[Our Lil' Family]

Oh how sad!! I would go with her too. I think Monica had good ideas about seeing them again one day.

[CantWait]

How sad. Ton of hugs for Ashley.

[ediep]

oh man, How awful! poor Ashley! she must be heartbroken. No worries about the catholic funeral mass--- usually the casket is there, although its closed. Also, Im sure you know, don't wear anything brightly colored or flashy.... mostly dark colors and black. I'd definitely go with her.