My chart for the first time in forever looked wonderful, but I started spotting today.
I had so much hope for this cycle; our timing was perfect, FF gave us high chances of conception; and today was day 28 of what is normally a 28 day cycle with three days of spotting before hand, I had nothing. Last month was different, but I was hoping that was a fluke.Anyway, I'm crushed and heartbroken
I know I should be greatful that I have two beautiful boys (and I am
), but they are growing up so fast and I always wanted three kids. I just thought with as crappy as my childhood was and everything I had to go through, just one thing in life would be easy 
What makes me even angrier is that dh and I really got our crap together to be a good couple with each other and we wanted to do this together instead of it being an oopsie and now we can't.
It also fustrates me that I've lost three babies and don't get one in the end. It's like all those losses were worth NOTHING
I'm just so fustrated and upset right now
